Like every mother, I remember the first time I held my son. I was so overwhelmed with the plethora of emotions that was going on. I felt happiness, love and fear at the same time and my hands trembled while I held him. But at that moment I promised my son that I will be the best mom he can ever have.
'Best mom', that's what every one of us try to be when we become a mother. I did it too. I always feel blessed to have my mother by my side till date and am astonished how she could do everything so perfectly. I wanted to do the same for my son. I wanted to become that perfect mother who does everything effortlessly and with perfection. But, a day came when I faltered and I was devastated. I thought I was the worst mother ever and cried like a baby only because I overfed my baby and he vomited. Then came a day when he was crying continuously and I couldn't understand why. That made me question my existence(exaggeration.yes, maybe). AND then came the day when I had to leave him at home to join my work. I thought I was a horrible person and I could not concentrate on anything. To top it all, my elderly colleagues had so my questions on why I decided to join back work and not be with my baby, that I stared contemplating my decisions.
As time passed by, from a toddler my son become an infant and now he is a big 5 years old boy. And guess what? He turned out to be quite a good boy. He is empathetic, enthusiastic and inquisitive to explore new things. Now that I see him I realize that the is no right or wrong way to bring up your child. So here are few things I think you should always keep in mind.
No body knows your child as well as you do: there are so many advises that will be shot at you every day. But remember to follow your own heart and your own brain because every child is different. What has worked well for someone else's child will not necessarily work for your own and vice versa. So listen to what everyone has to say but do what you know is best
Your child is an individual: Remember that every one including your child is an individual and you would want to be that way. To ensure that he or she can harness their own strength, you need to give them the space to be what they want. Keeping that in mind, don't follow some one else's parenting habits to the T. You can always see others and take inspiration but always measure and reason out if that is the best thing to do for your child as well. Also, remember to give them space and let them be bored sometime, that way they will figure out what they like to do themselves.
Don't try to be the best mother, just try your best: The term'best' is overrated. Like every child is different, every women is also different. We all have our positives and negatives but for our child's sake, we can always try to become a better person and prioritize what is best for your child.
People will talk, let them: Being a social animal, we will always be surrounded by people. As we are know that people are judgmental and know matter what you do, they will talk. So always remember that people who talks doesn't live your life or is not in your situation so don't think about what others say but do things what you think is best for yourself and your family.
Your child will grow up, so don't loose yourself:Always remember that no matter what you do, one day your child will grow up and will have his/her individual life. When they do, should not regret that you have lost so much time and could not do much for yourself. Your child is your responsibility and priority now so balance your time towards your child and yourself. Don't give up everything that you love.
Happy parenting!