I wrote this diary halfway but left it unfinished because of the flower competition results. Just when I was thinking about finishing and publishing it, MS added few more Maal in the Mall. After a quick scan I found luxury Car, SUV, Belts (man’s & woman’s), Pen, Feng Shui Frog (or is it Toad?), Evil eye pendant, many cakes, Domestic air ticket (but a picture of boarding pass), News paper, magazine, audio CD, milk &few other unexciting stuff.
I was bored with the same expensive gifts. Sutta- 100 bucks, Basket Ball- 200 ! Even with the additions, things doesn’t seem to better. Luxury car- M$P 7500, SUV- 5000 !
Most of the goodies are extremely dull. The few which are exciting, comes with an exorbitant price tag . Members have to pay through their nose and other orifices for SUVs & Planes.
The Gift exchange could be taken into a new dimension with few more Rupchik Maal added to the Mall. Here’s my wish list of maal with the proposed price. Let me categorize them for easy comprehension.
Lifestyle/ Luxury
Champagne Bottle- If we can have flowers, ‘Will you marry me Ring’, candle light dinner it’s the obvious next. M$P 1000.
Assortment of imported Wine bottles- for who understands taste. M$P 2000.
Old Monk rum- For friends to gift me & other OMkars of MS. M$P 100.
Beer- It’s a drink like coffee, & juice, to chill in summer. M$P 200.
Hammock- To have the beer. M$P 300.
Hookah- Honed smokers are in quitting spree. Next change is Orange/ Strawberry flavored non tobacco smoke. M$P 100.
Cuban Cigar- To have with the wines. M$P 500.
Weighing machine- The next fastest 0 to 60 after sports car. M$P150.
Travel/ Transportation
- Hummer Limousine- For special people. (Picture enclosed) M$P25,000.
Helicopter- for VIPs who need to visit places w/o airport. M$P 5000.
Speed boat- Presently there’s no water transportation. M$P 5000.
Luxury Yacht- A must have for the Private Jet, Beach Villa or Ferrari/ Porsche owners. M$P 20,000 + Five bikinis as free gift. (Picture enclosed)
Tractor- For the heavyweights and those who thinks it’s about attitude. M$P 2000.
Topless 4x4 all terrain Jeep- For those who thinks SUV is cliché. M$P 4000+ 1 bikini free
Bicycle- for the eco-friendly. Price- M$P 300.
Garments/ Accessories
Burkha/ Robe- For the shy ones who want to skulk around without being identified. M$P 300.
Undergarments- Else, what should one wear underneath the suits & dresses? M$P 200.
Pure silk Negligee- To go with ‘Just married’ & Hotel room for two. M$P 300. Bottle of Chocolate Body paint- who prefer chocolate over negligee. M$P 500 Superman outfit- For the supermen who wear their chaddi over their costumes. M$P 500.
Superwoman outfit- For any normal women. M$P1000 with buy one get one free offer.
Belgian glass mirror- For ladies only. M$P 100 but free with bikini.
Measuring tape- To measure, ofcourse. M$P 5. Free with weighing machine.
Miscellaneous Maal
Box of Pin- To deflate the ego of pseudo intellectuals. M$P 20.
Grease- Multipurpose use. M$P 50.
Matchbox- Multipurpose use. M$P 5.
Contraceptives – Explanation unnecessary again. Price- M$P 100 but can be made complimentary with ‘Hotel room for two’ or ‘Evening at Disco’.
Emergency contraceptive pills- If regular contraceptive fails. M$P 100
New born kit- When everything fails. M$P 3000.
Pepper spray- To immobilize bad supermans. M$P 200
Tiger Balm- for headaches it’s still the best cure. Price- M$P 50 (Free for Faisal).
Revolver- To give "Supari' or to to commit suicide after rejection. All may not like the taste of Poison. M$P 500.
Gadgets/ Gizmos
Television- Whats the use of a DVD player w/ o a TV? M$P 500
Blackberry- For Fullonline Devdas & Devis. M$P 200
Handycam- to capture the e-motions. M$P 100
Butane Lighter- for the cigar. M$P 200
Toys- errr…there should be a different section altogether. Price on request.
Special Gestures
‘Bang’ placard- Comes next after Slap, Kick, Poke….etc. M$P 50.
‘Will you be my reader?’ placard- for the comment starved. M$P 50.
‘Do not disturb’ sign- for those who actually wants more attention. M$P 50.
'Scratch' sign- quid pro quo. M$P 50.
‘Gee! Hyuk Hyuk’ sign- when your favorite member starts writing again or changes his/ her picture. M$P 50
Possibilities are endless. What do you want?