I was watching this one serial, a huge hit the other day. A girl who was married at the age of 13 and now 17 has just been widowed. And since I've been watching the serial for quite some time I knew what they would show her fate to be.

It's not the serial that am concerned about but the state of widows in our society that suddenly struck me. 17 or 37 it just doesn't make a difference. A widow is made to lead a color less (literally) life. She can't remarry, except in few "liberal" cases. She can't wear bright colors, she can't be a part of any wedding functions because she will cast an unlucky shadow on the bride/groom to be. What is she supposed to do ? She has to perform the duties of a wife and a daughter in law.

I am not talking of a rural set up here. This happens in our urban cities as well. I have two aunts who lead a widowed life. Regarding remarriage their situation was a bit unfavorable. They both had adult children and this does make remarrying a bit difficult. But they voluntarily weren't a part of many functions of my sister's wedding. They didn't give her "aashirwaad" while the rituals were taking place because they believed that they would cast an unlucky shadow on her. Isn't that totally and absolutely inane ? How can a happy and good hearted person cause a bad shadow on any one ? If the woman's husband has died does it make her ill fated, not just for herself but for all around her ? NO it doesn't.

Why can't she wear bright colors ? If she does wear colors does that mean that she isn't sad about her husband's demise that she needs to be reminded every day and every time ? My aunts still don't wear bright colors. I see them in boring dull colors and no jewelery. Hell a husband dying doesn't mean you ought to lose interest in life and living.

I know of some women who were widowed at ages under 30 and still lead a widowed life. Their parents didn't think of remarrying the girls and the in laws are happy having a house maid sorts. How disgusting is that. They should be encouraged to remarry, work, mingle with the society and have a happy life. Don't you think so ?!

Everybody has a right to live. Everybody has a right to enjoy life.