Husband: Tumse shaadi karke mujhe ek bahut bada faayda hua hai!
Wife: Woh kya?
Husband: Mujhe mere gunaaho ki saza jeete jee hi mil gayi!
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Husband: Sir, meri wife gumm ho gayi hai.
Postmaster: Bhai yeh postoffice hai. Ja ke policestation mein complaint likhao.
Husband: Kya karun…, khushi ke mare kuch samaj hi nahi aa raha…
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Bahu: Maaji, yeh abhi tak nahi aaye, kahi koi ladki ka chakkar toh nahi hai unke ?
Maaji: Are kalmuhi tu toh hamesha galat hi sochti hai, Ho sakta hai ke kisi truck ke niche aa gaya ho!
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Wife: Woh admi jo drink kar raha hai, Usko maine 10 saal pehle shadi ke liye inkaar kia tha. Dekho who aaj tak sharab pee raha hai!
Husband: Wow! itni lambi celebration!
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Shaadi mein ek pathan bahut der tak khana kha raha tha.
Kisi ne poocha kab tak khaoge?
Pathan: Mein toh khud kha-kha ke dukhi hoon, Per kya karon card mein likha thaDinner 7 PM to 10 PM.
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Santa proposing a girl: Darling kya tum mujse shadi karogi?
Girl: Tameez se baat karo.
Santa: Behan ji, kya aap mujhse shaadi karogi?
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Lalu to Rabri: Agar tum batao ki iss bag ke andar kya hai, toh sare eggs tumare, agar tum batao kitne eggs toh 8 ke 8 tumare, aur agar tum bata do ke ande kiske hai toh woh murgi bhi tumari.
Rabri: Lalu Ji, koi hint toh do na plz?
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Police: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phansi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha ha ha!
Police: Kyu hass rahe ho?
Sardar: Main toh subah 8 baje tak sota hoon!
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Circiut: Bhai, who apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla hai aaj raat ko dinner pe.
Mera Sara chain collection apne kamray mein chupa do na please.
Munna bhai: Kyun tera dost chor hai kya?
Circiut: Nahin Bhai, woh apne chain pehchan lega.
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Boy to girl at a dance
party: “Kya tum mere sath dance karogi?”
Girl reply: “Main bacche ke saath dance nahi karti.”
Boy: Sorry mujhe pata nahi tha ki tum pregnent ho.
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Santa: I am going ka matlab batao.
Banta: Main ja raha hoon.
Santa: Main nahi jane dunga, pehle matlab bata.
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Pandit : Tumhare jeevan mein 6 ladkiya aayengi.
Thambu : Wow, kya baat hai.
Pandit: Zyada khush honey ki baat nahi hai. Ek gharwali aur 5 betiya hai..
Pathan ko dost ne khanay pe bulaya.
Pathan jab dost ke ghar aaya toh ghar pe tala laga tha,
Aur likha tha maine bewaqoof banaya tumko.
Pathan ne Hoshiyari dikhai or niche likh diya,
“Main toh aaya hi nahi tha”
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Research ke mutabiq larkian larkon se zyada mehnati hoti hai
Aapko pata hai kaise??
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Nahi pata
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Main bata deta hoon aapko
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Kyun ki
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100 mein se 10
Larkia’n naturally
khoobsurat hoti hai
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Aur baki
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Apni Mehnat se…
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Malik alsi nokar se:- Yahan par itne sare machcher gun-gun kar rahen hai tu unhe maar gira.
Thodi der bad
Malik:- Abe sale nokar ke bachche maine tujhe machcher marne ko kaha abhi tak tune mare nahi. Woh ab bhi gun-guna kar rahe hai
Alsi nokar:- Malik machcher toh maine maar diye. Yeh toh unki bibi h