Batman v Superman is not so much a superhero movie as it is a story about two mamma’s boys measuring the length of their capes, finding that they disagree, and proceeding to poke each other with threats of ‘you wanna go first? ’ for a solid two-and-a-half hours.
Don’t get me wrong: The film has its moments, but there comes a point when you can’t justify it to yourself any longer. There is only so much grim brooding one movie can accommodate, and Ben Affleck uses that quota up in the very first scene, which, either on purpose or by complete fluke, foreshadows the self-contradictory nature of this movie.