Let’s get one thing out of the way right at the beginning. Yes, I have heard the horror stories about Burger King - the lack of proper supervision; the unofficial ’’additions’’ to the sauces; the serving of burgers which had fallen on the floor but were shoved back in the griller... you get the idea. Every fast food chain I know of has tales like this told about it, and I’m sure that at least some of them are even true. Yet I continue to eat at Burger King, and to enjoy the experience. Why?
The simple answer is that I don’t think about the ’’dark side’’ when I visit a Burger King - if you want a meal that’s been carefully and lovingly prepared by experts, then you don’t go to a fast food restaurant in the first place. Places like BK are there to serve a different purpose: to provide affordable, edible meals that can fill a hole in your stomach. And in general, they do this very well. To illustrate my point, we’ll have a look at the Whopper Meal - a burger, fries and soft drink, which will set you back around £3.99, depending on the franchise (of which more later). If you’re feeling really ravenous, you can ’’Go Large’’, which entails paying an extra 30p and getting a large Coke (or whatever) and fries, instead of the normal medium.
First, let’s concentrate on the Whopper itself. Their main competitor, McDonald’s, can’t provide anything like this. A large slab of flame grilled beef (noticeably more generous, and indeed tastier, than McDonald’s fried Quarter-Pounder) in a bun, with a varied assortment of sauces and salad - the onions, in particular, being better than you might expect in this sort of product; the Whopper lives up to its name. There’s a lot of food here - Burger King aren’t known for skimping - and it really does satisfy you. Sure, the sheer size of the thing means that you have to open your mouth obscenely wide to get your teeth around it, and that bits of tomato regularly fall out into the box (or onto the table, if you’re not taking care); but then a burger restaurant is hardly the place for delicate etiquette, is it?
On to the fries, and again Burger King beats Ronald & Co hands down. BK’s King Fries, so long as they are really hot, are superb - just the right texture, not so much salt that it overwhelms everything else, and right on the border between crunchiness and tenderness. You get a decent helping, as well, even in the medium portion that comes with the standard Whopper Meal. As I say, though, they do have to be hot - lukewarm King Fries are not going to do your tastebuds any favours. To avoid this, it’s usually best to eat at the start of a busy period - have lunch at 11:45, for example. This means there’s less risk of being served old food.
As for the drinks, there isn’t a great deal to say, really. You get a choice of Coke (normal or diet), Sprite or Fanta; these taste pretty much as you’d expect, served in the bog-standard cheapo plastic cup with straw. There’s the normal half glacier in there, which means anyone with sensitive teeth (me!) will have to be careful, but I don’t think it’s done out of meanness - there’s still a generous amount of actual drink in the cup.
So, that’s the most common combination: what else is available? Plenty, is the answer. Burger King will serve you other beefburgers (including the truly colossal Double Bacon Whopper with Cheese, which looks like something that might be served at a strongman competition), chickenburgers, beanburgers and fishburgers; some ’’oh, I never realised McDonald’s did anything like this - we just made it up ourselves, honest!’’ bits’n’bobs such as chicken pieces; tea, coffee, fruit juice, milk and shakes; a couple of puddings (I never have these, so can’t comment on their quality); and last but by no means least, their absolutely terrific onion rings. I’ve seen a couple of negative remarks about these, but every time I’ve ordered them they’ve been great.
Service in Burger King, while not outstanding, is generally OK. You’ll usually be served reasonably quickly, and you’re unlikely to get the wrong amount in change. When your tray is ready, you may get a brief ’’enjoy your meal’’, but don’t expect any of the dazzling beams you get elsewhere. Personally, I prefer it this way - I can’t stand that sort of patently false smile. There’s usually someone wiping down the tables (which are therefore normally quite clean) and chucking out rubbish (though I always do that myself - after all, how much effort does it take to walk 10 yards to a litter bin?). And best of all, most branches are completely non-smoking. This is a blessed relief after other chains’ completely useless attempts at creating smoking and non-smoking areas, which just doesn’t work. You will find that some branches allow smoking, though: it depends on the franchise.
Mention of franchises brings me to another important point. If you go to a McDonald’s, then the price for a particular item is the same throughout the country. If it’s £2.99 in Leeds, it’ll be £2.99 in Exeter. That’s not the case with Burger King. Franchisees are (apparently) given some leeway in setting prices, so more prestigious locations tend to be more expensive. This factor can occasionally lead to some rather silly discrepancies - for example, the outlet in Birmingham New Street station is often more expensive than the one outside in New Street itself, all of 300 yards away. But in general, prices are set reasonably.
As I say, Burger King is no gourmet’s paradise (gourmand’s paradise, perhaps...), but it knows its market and serves it well. All that’s left for you to do is to weigh up the odds, and to decide whether the tasty, filling food or the cautionary tales are going to win out in your mind. For me, it’s the former.