I didn’t know you had to dress up to go to pubs. I always thought pubs were big warm comfy restaraunts. Judging from the other reviews, though, I guess a pub is the equivalent of what we in the states would call a nightclub.
I’m only sixteen(boohoo) so legally I’m not allowed in a lot of clubs. However where I live there are a bunch of non-alcoholic places just for teens. The problem with those places is that no one shows up, and when you get there with two other people you feel like a retard. And the music just doesn’t seem as good. Oh well I can wait until I’m 18. .anyway.enough about that.let’s get on with this review
On the few occasions when I have been in a real live nightclub(a normal one, not one of those stupid’teenager’ nightclubs) I have noticed that the way the people dress can set the tone for the entire nightclub. A lot of reviewers have posted a lot of do’s and don’t’s, but in general it doesn’t matter what you look like as long as you feel comfortable. People who look uncomfortable stick out like a sore thumb. However if you absolutely need help:
1) guys don’t wear tight jeans. please.
2) pleated pants are bad for both genders
3) Nightclubs are not at all like what they are portrayed in Hindi movies. So don’t dress like Poo unless that’s the way you normally dress. in that case it’s fine.
4) I don’t know about Indian nightclubs, but my guess is that Indian clothes would work there. At the desi parties in the US, ABCD guys wear full length kurtas, the vest, the chunni, and everything. I guess it must be really hot with all that on, but it doesn’t seem to impair their dancing at all. And they look really cute until they open their mouth. Indian FOB males tend to wear glasses and T-shirts with the word NIKE printed across them. Girls usually dress the same regardless of whether they are ABCD or FOB.they usually wear halter top lehengas or saris with tube tops instead of blouses.
5) Some people have recommended brand name T-shirts. These are a waste of money. It doesn’t matter what the brand is as long as it looks okay. Personally, if I saw someone wearing one I would think s/he is an idiot for spending that money on a tiny logo in the upper right hand corner of the shirt. A girl who only wears brand names is bad enough. But a guy who only wears brand name clothes is even worse. Both are obviously insecure. Generally the only people who wear brand name t-shirts are the ones who say’cool’ a lot(not realizing that the word cool is out of date and is now only uttered by SRK)
6) Also no matter how well you’re dressed, humping someone doesn’t qualify as dancing.
7) WEAR WHAT YOU WANT AND STOP WORRYING ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK. If you want to wear a salwar kameez then wear it and don’t worry about it. If you ABSOLUTELY have the urge to dress like Kareena go ahead. But don’t think you HAVE to dress slutty just because you’re dancing.
The good thing about dancing in nightclubs is that most of the time it is at least semi-dark. So it doesn’t matter if you can’t dance because no one can see you. Also you don’t necessarily have to dance just because you are at a nightclub. Sometimes it’s better to wait until there are more people on the floor. A lot of times it can be really fun trying to scream over the music at other people. Then when they make their way across the room to you, say’Clouds can jump’ or something similarly irrelevant. Some really interesting conversations can take place at nightclubs.
I still like mosh pits better than nightclub dancing though. Nightclubs are more dressy but mosh pits are dancing-with-a-hundred-strangers-all-at-once-while-you-scream-and-someone-sprays-mud-all-over-everyone. If you don’t know what a mosh pit is, think about an intensified version of Holi with 300 people packed in a closet.
A lot has been written about the desi party scene in America, but I have usually been bored to death at desi parties. Almost every Indian girl has experienced THE INDIAN PICK UP LINE
Guy(walking up to girl in lehenga): Hi. Are you Indian?
Me:(looking around) Yeah.(No you retard. I’m an alien from mars)
Guy: Wow what a coincidence! So am I! Which kind of Indian are you?(If the answer is Punjabi, a lengthy one-sided discussion of bhangra follows, punctuated periodically with the words’Punjabi food rocks!’ If the answer is anything other than punjabi, he can always resort to THE HINDUISM PICK UP LINE)
THE HINDUISM PICK UP LINE
Guy: Yeah, I read the Bhagavad Gita once.
Me: Hmmm
Guy:(continues lying) Yeah, it was really cool. I read the upaneeshaaads too once. And the Koran.wait, I mean, Puran.
Me: hmmm.which puran?( I start gradually leaving)
Guy: the main one.So, you aren’t punjabi? You look like a punjabi though. Bhangra.(At this point he sees a girl in a chania choli(aka Kareena Kapoor#2) and gradually walks away.The words’bhagavad gita’ drift over to me again before I bump into the two pious Hindus making out in the restroom)
SITTING BY THE TABLE
Old Indian Aunty: It is so encouraging to see our youth taking interest in Indian culture. It brings tears to my eyes.
Old Indian Uncle(takes a break from talking about Dubya and American evilness) Yes, now it isconsidered cool to be Indian. Just look at all those IIT professionals in Silicon Valley. Americans need all Indians because they know Indians are hard working and intelligent.our sanskirti our samaj.
I escape from the uncles and aunties and the Kareena Kapoors and sigh with relief. The Indian pick up line is a classic and can be heard anywhere, from classrooms to the temple to desi parties. The only one more reliable is the YOUR FACE LOOKS REALLY FAMILIAR DO I KNOW YOU? WELL I GUESS I DO NOW PICK UP LINE. And then there is the INDO-PAK PICK UP LINE.but you really don’t want to hear it.
I guess I should make fun of’gora’ nightclubs now before people claim I am prejudiced against desis.hmm.the only funny thing that I saw was when the DJ played’Mundian to Bach Ke Rahe’ and all the white people were completely flabbergasted. The only people dancing were the Indians and a group of Pakistani guys.
Comments are welcome and please let me know if I made this too long.