Dreary days makes many of us feel the blues. I am going to write about how I help myself through the dark days without drugs. I am taking a chance in writing about it because, sometimes when I write something, well, life has a way of making liar’s out of the best of intentions.
I have struggled with the blues on and off for many years. I have self medicated for many years with legal, and illegal drugs. Then I gave it up to gain control of my life.
The first thing that helped was realizing that I was an extra sensitive individual. That I was human. I seemed to feel things deeper than others, still do.
Then I realized there was a void I had been trying to fill. I felt lonely often, and had few friends.
Early on I danced on the beach listening to my walk-man. It helped fill the void this way.
I became obsessed with reading. I had to have a book in progress at all times. I grieved every time I finished a book. I cured my back problem through reading a book on back pain, and learned why I chose to have it. This was amazing, but I cured it when I realized what I was hiding from by having a bad back. Which happened to be living.
I then kept reading on spiritual matters. Gaining a wealth of knowledge concerning religion, and the history thereof. Everyone is on their own journey, and mine is ongoing. I will not ever say, this is it, or this is the way, because like I said before, life has a way of making hypocrites out of the best of us.
Depression and exercise: A cure all. Free.
The first time I went for a walk in years of being sedentary I came home, and my son looked at my face and said, ’ma you okay? Your face is all flushed!’
I was coming alive for the first time in many years. Exercise releases endorphins and dopamine, those are the natural morphine for the body. These are released when you exercise. This will make you feel more in sync, and you will start to go through a metamorphous. You will see your mind clearing up, and your body come to life. Just do it and see.
Exercise has taken me through many dark days, giving me inner sunshine!
Eating when you are hungry:
When you eat it also releases endorphins, and other calming chemicals, such as selenium.
Sleeping when you are tired. Do not try to stay out drinking with the buddies all weekend, and then wonder why you are depressed for the next week. It is about taking care of yourself. You must not turn your back on yourself. There are plenty of people who will do that for you.
Sleep when you are tired. Eat when you are hungry.
Being alone, feeling isolated, can trigger depression in the worst of ways. You feel so depressed that going out to meet people can be overwhelming at times. This is when you have to stop paying attention to your thoughts!
Just force yourself to go out. Go to the library, or the mall or wherever you are fantasizing about going. Even being around strangers sometimes can help. A friendly smile can make you feel less invisible, and giving one is even better, for you! To my lonely friends I say: Get out! Just do it! No more excuses!
Lighting:
Keep your lights high! This is very important! Do not sit in a dark room with black curtains, and wonder why you are thinking of death! Only you can open the curtains, and bring in the light. There are no light police who will come in to your house, and say you are in danger of darkness. No one will save you, but you!
Turn those lights up, and turn the TV off!
Stop watching the News!
There are so many new channels, and many of them are of news from all ends of the earth. Do we really need to know what is going on in Ethiopia?(I think there is a need for this, and is my interest, ) but I limit it.
Okay so I did not say to ignore the world, however, if you are trying to get your life in order, you have no business stretching your emotions on things you cannot do anything about.
Focus on yourself totally for a while until you work a routine for yourself. It’s the little things that mean a lot.
Powerlessness:
Let me just say this: A lot of depression comes from thinking you can control other’s, and outcomes of situations, especially when other people are involved. And when they do not do what you want, you get depressed. You are powerless over everyone but yourself.(Excluding children.) So why sweat over someone else’s life. They have to figure it out for themselves, even a spouse.
Some people try to will the sun to come out on a cloudy day. Their day can be ruined because it didn’t work. They will walk around like a grouch all day, and then try to force control onto their poor unsuspecting wife! Ooops:)
In the end, I own my blues like a golden nugget. It is mine, and no one caused it, nor can fix it, but me.