*You know you are in Kolkata when*-*
People who know your name and those who don’t insist on calling you “Dada” or “Didi”
Roads are shiny with pebbles stuck on top for better grip!
Where all languages speak Bengali and come up with amazing new words like “Dhuk gaya” meaning:Went in.(A mixture of Bengali- Dhuke giyechi and Hindi- Ghus Gaya)
Where Clubs and Pubs rock daily and have the best nightlife in India
The yummiest snack in every neighbourhood is “Phuchka”
Local shopkeepers act as if you are disturbing them if you go to buy
New Town is a place that is 10 years old but still underdeveloped and with more wildlife than human life
Durga pujo is when all things joyous happens
“Bondh”(strike) is a way of life and are more than your earned leaves
Shopping for anything leads you to “Gariahat” or “New Market”
When you are always between the Devil or the Deep Blue sea- “CPM” or “Trinamool”
Going in a taxi(which seem stolen from scrap-yards) costs more than anyplace in India.
When you hear people quarrelling over 25 paise at one place and then buying “Ilish maach” for Rs.600/- at another
When the heavy iron content in water in Salt Lake makes you go bald
When there are more “Misti” shops than medicine shops
When rains make entire Kolkata seem a part of Hoogly
Where heat & humidity seem to be the only weather the whole year around
Where autos will travel only if there are 4 more people you don’t know travelling with you to the same destination
Where “Singur” is a way to say Tata
Where potbelly, being be-spectacled is always in fashion
Flyover constructions happen with pieces of wood for support rather than cables or steel poles
Where Central Park, Victoria Gardens, Elliot Park, Millenium Park and almost all parks are filled with romantic couples re-writing the Garden of Eden
Where “torko”(argument) is a way of speaking
based on 3 years of self experience