In every way, Rush Hour 2 embodies everything that’s corrupt
about summer cinema - noisy, cheap gimmickery, wailing
protagonists and lackluster direction. It’s the personification
of trecheary into a film reel; a single, haunting example
of just why many movie purists view today’s flock as a diseased
one.
Attributing this movie’s failure to one facet would be like
searching vociferously for the proverbial needle in a haystack;
Rush Hour 2 is just so bad in every way that singling out
one particularly angered beetle would be a wild goose chase.
First, the plot develops just like the OJ Simpson Trial did -
lethargically and inefficiently. The whole setup is your atypical
action film arrangement - a cop and his partner are searching
around for leads to a big criminal case and continue runing around
till the movie’s climax and inevitable end (to the tune of
which I was smiling). Essentially, the story could have
been authored by a chimp, given how much it runs around in
circles and wastes the time of people that’d rather stare
at Zhang Ziyi for 2 hours.
And there’s what I believe is the prime aspect of the film,
Zhang Ziyi. Her and Rosalyn Sanchez and Chan (excluding
the booming Tucker for reasons constituted by his inability
to add to the film anything more than his incessant wailing) are
what could have crafted the summer’s best piece, but their
under-utilization destroys any quality battles the movie
may have had.
As an advocator of more chop socky stuff on this side of the
swamp, I am gravely and thoroughly appalled by this atrocity.
It resembles a repulsive dog, licking his crotch for hours
on end and barking, while never amounting to anything that could
net him respect amongst his peers. Virtually every aspect
of Rush Hour 2 makes it referable to said dog, as it is easily
the loudest, most undeserving of acclaim film this summer
has yet seen (besides Pearl Harbor).