Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: Out Of The Shadows is a film no self-respecting teen could sit through. Produced by schlockmeister Michael Bay and directed by the devotedly imitative David Green, it feels like a poor and overlong cartoon with all the colour sapped out of it. This is a B-movie with a blockbuster budget and not an enjoyable B-movie at that: this is a film about four of the Hulk’s disembodied biceps running around sewers and trying - in some stupid way - to save the world. The villains have no character, the heroes are annoying, the dialogue is awful and, for 90 per cent of the movie, the Turtles forget how old they are.