You’d rather not hear it now? But I want you to hear it. We never need to say

anything to each other when we’re together. This is--for the time when we won’t

be together. I love you, Dominique. As selfishly as the fact that I exist. As

selfishly as my lungs breathe air. I breathe for my own necessity, for the fuel

of my body, for my survival. I’ve given you, not my sacrifice or my pity, but my

ego and my naked need. This is the only way you can wish to be loved. This is

the only way I can want you to love me. If you married me now, I would become

your whole existence. But I would not want you then. You would not want

yourself--and so you would not love me long. To say ’I love you’ one must know

first how to say the ’I.’ The kind of surrender I could have from you now would

give me nothing but an empty hulk. If I demanded it, I’d destroy you. That’s why

I won’t stop you. I’ll let you go to your husband. I don’t know how I’ll live

through tonight, but I will. I want you whole, as I am, as you’ll remain in the

battle you’ve chosen. A battle is never selfless."