My heart still skips a beat when he looks at me and smiles.

I still feel at ease and relaxed when he's around. Relaxed such that I know no wrong, no negativity, no discomfort.

I still place some trust in him.

I still love his jokes.

I can still lay in his arms. close my eyes and want to be there forever.

Oh it still feels divine when he holds me.

BUT

I also know he has broken my heart a lot many times.

I also know that he wont help me get rid of my insecurities and doubts.

I also know that people don't change.

I also know that he does still lie.

DAMN PRACTICALITY.

DAMN DAMN DAMN

Hadn't I told myself that I will never see his face again ? Hadn't I told my self that I will never let him hold me again. Hadn't I thought that I will never feel engrossed or whatever that is that makes me forget all else when I am with him.

P.S. - Hugging in a car isn't a crime and cops should not try and make money out of such a bloody simple gesture.