CONFESSION:
I have forgotten how to write a review, folks!
"To err is human, not to get jacked for it is Divine!"
YEH KYA HO RAHA HAI? This one is in Defence of Bharat Sarkar, in the case of Bharat Sarkar v/s Mouthshut ka Overall Rating, published in the public domain regarding a Low Cost endeavour (read Airline) launched by Air India - AIR INDIA EXPRESS.
Agree, it is mischristened, with the suffix of ’Express’, which to the aam aadmi signifies something better than ’saada’. That apart, ladies and their gentlemen, take a minute.
Think (though ladies may not like their gentlemen when they think, courtesy: Mumbai Salsa).
AIRLINE KYON? Why does one travel by air?
Presumably, to get there faster, than Road and Rail. Exceptions are if you take buses in Kerala and bicycles in UP/ Bihar! Again, wonlee the time of ’Travel’ by selected carrier is considered. If Bangalore airport is not traceable on Google Earth by decongested connecting roads, or if Kolkata airport’s runway ends on the dome of a mosque or if Congestion takes more time than constipation, the airline is not to blame, per se!
Next, in today’s age of flight ticket costing INR 99 on Ads and the gullible passenger indulging his ’shauk’ buying the ticket finally at INR 2500 (taxes, Sir-Charges, Sauna charges (non-AC times!) included), ’shauk’ ends up in ’shock’.
Or, if one wins Prizes on sites like Mouthshut, if only to pacify the CEO, one has to fly, you see!
LOW COST KYON? Now, why does one buy a ticket on a Low Cost airline?
First, if you are short on cash.
Next, if you are not, but are financially savvy.
Thirdly, if your tickets are courtesy Contests!
Fourth (unlikely), if you are on a diet, or have just had your fill, or are waiting to have your fill at the destination.
Fifth, if your office does not pay for IT, and you are more concerned about ’Reaching’ than how!
AIR INDIA EXPRESS Haazir Ho: Air India has huge advantages in the airline industry. It owns everything. It has everything- sarkaari gaadi, bangla, makaan and log. You and me pay for all that, use it or not! So, why blame Sarkaar, if they decided to take a piece of the Deccan-Go-Spice pie?
- Brand new, artistically painted (each aircraft has a different tail paint-design, showcasing one facet of India) Boeing 737-800 aircraft.
Trained and polite (by Govt standards) staff onboard. Accents may vary, but that’s Bharatiya diversity for you, Saar!
Good uholstery. (Leg space and seat comfort don’t count; Boeing does that enmasse!).
Wonlee Economy Class, pleeej!
You get first row, if it has not yet been given away, unlike on most others! Except, of course, if you are a ’badaa saab’ or ’bade saab ke woh’!
Operates to 26 destinations within India and to South-East Asia and the Gulf, having commenced operations in 2005.
Has recorded major profits, especially on its core Gulf (read Malaya-Lee from Dubai) sector, which has led to a lethors of others queing up for a slice of the Mallu’s Manee!
MAARO SARKAAR KO:
-Sarkari attitude, folks, in some measure. ...lekin Humhaare neta aur babu log kahan sudharein hain, ki airline staff ki hum band bajaa rahein hai bhai!
-No plastic smiles 24x7. No bending rules either. But, if they have it, and you would like to have it and you can have it, if you ask properly, you CAN! My father isn’t an MP and I am not ’connected’, but I managed to get a first row and choice seats when I asked.
-Stereo Socket Hai, kaam nahin karta! Achchaa, gaana bhee sunna hai, paise bhi kum dena hai, khaana bhi khaana hai? Yes... Meals are served onboard, and they are Good and sufficient and hot. Yessir, and ma’am, Air india Express charges you low cost fares, but serves you food and water, without restriction on water bottles!
No filthy plastic garbage bags, no making you feel ’small’ just because you are travelling low-cost, without ordering ’sendwiches and cheeps’ from the trolley, no 129 ml water bottles! Proper khaana-peena-service, but hum low cost hain jee, aur sarkaari bhee! Brutus indeed is an honourable man! As regards the stereo sockets, carry your own ear phones, the music may play at times, galti se! Otherwise, policy is ’no music on domestic sectors’. Earphones are sold, if you need them, on international sectors. The logic of not playing iped music beats me, though! They could operate it out of the pilot’s mobile, if required!
USP:
Achchaa, ’khaana free’ on low cost is not good enough not to trash a Government venture? Ok!
Have you heard of timely performance in indian skies? No, not in brochures, but in real life! Both times I flew (Bombay - Calicut/ Calicut - Bombay), the flight was On Time! (+/- 15 min of ETA/ETD is on-time, in airline terms). And that includes on-time landing at Bombay. Haan jee!
The flight (at Bombay) operates from the International Airport, providing a rush-free Boarding Gate, generally. The conveyor belt area was empty, when the return flight landed. You will know the benefit if you have arrived GoAir ishtyle after 9 pm at Mumbai with a few flights delayed a few hours! (I have! So I know!)
Hiccup: There was one Hiccup, on our return leg. Some of the checked-in baggage had to be offloaded at the start, due to some overall-weight related problems. This necessitated a 1.5 hour wait on arrival at Bombay. But the passengers were informed in time, taken to a lounge and served tea and snacks during the wait. Otions were also open to come back any time in the next 24 hours to collect the baggage, if there was urgent business to be attended to, needing one’s immediate departure from the airport.
(Hence, the 1-star reduction in overall rating, which otherwise, by me, would have been 5*, for the 2 flights I flew on Air India Express).
Mindset Badlein? Try It, Don’t Trash It Just for Being a Government Low Cost Airline, like I did! I never knew meals were included, as the website doesn’t say so! I booked it only as it was the Cheapest on the sector (INR 2500, one way). I had even told friends that I was flying by KSRTC (Kerala’s DTC/ BEST!) and that ETA could be intimated only if and after the flight landed, with or without doors! And Boy, wasn’t I in for some big-time surprises!
Wiki has some cool info-bits on Air India Express.
Check it out at: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Air-India_Express
Website: https://airindiaexpress.in/airindiaexpress/home.asp
Shyam’s Reco:
Fly Air India Express, if there is a flight operating in the sector you wish to fly.
Chances are, you will reach the destination, and what is more, on time.
.... And, the good meal served hot in the extremely comfortable interiors by well- behaved and polite staff without fake smiles makes sure your flying experience is ful-filling, in more ways than one!