Introduction: What sort of twitch it was? Did I just flipped through it? Did I not even bat an eye? Was it braille or something like that? I was taken aback when I discovered that the genre is Psychology.84 pages, point blank! An Introduction and Six Chapters, which concludes with an inconclusion. Author is Noah Tall (I have no inkling of the gender, I am just assuming it to be as prick) To all those avid readers who have been alerted by this euphemism, let me clarify right away that this is NOT any eulogy or profanity aimed towards Pschology. So, gas around elsewhere! By the way, you just got a whiff of shoddy gust which emanated from BLANK!
Synopsis: Introduction zooms in numerous instances titled the statue that didn’t smelled right, the evil child, the tiny laptop in the brain of your head & a better world in better orbit. Then, Noah tries to psyche out the reader using terms like leapative concluder, concussive unconsiousness, Sigmund Freud, dark fantasies ranging to maternal incest, nude Angelina Jolie, blah blah blah! I was about to close the book when he started comforting me. He said - "A habitual thinker would always advise ou. He would stop you from trusting your own instantaneous reactions." Remember, when you were blooming, you hesitantly asked your senior whether its okay to jerk off? Whatever his answer was, later in life you discounted him to be a total jerk!So there is no need for applying logic or calling for experts to rescue! Amoeba do what it naturally can. Thats why it stays healthy! Has anybody written any review on Porn Classics? But, you still watched them over and over again! The fact is nobody knows nothing!
Below mentioned are titles of 6 Chapters:
CI: Theory of Extra Lean Deli Slicing (ELDS)
CII: The Damp Basement (DB)
CIV: The Leonard Sly Blunder (LSB)
CIII: General Custor’s Little Big Plan or the case, JSC (Just say charge) Decision Making
CV: Mckenna’s Dilemma: How to find what people are thinking so you can take advantage of them without thinking
CVI: Bang! Bang! You’re still not Dead? The Delicate art of making holes in people without their minding
CI - Noah defines advanced noncognitive study in his own style. Intuitions can emerge from anywhere. You need not dig down deep to locate those exact zones. You will, anyways, never find the inner peace. Renounce what you cannot pronounce. This fingering around is what is called as Thick Slice Approach. And stop playing cat and mouse with that thing. Just Do it. Trusting and going by instincts is known as ELDS.
CII - Snap goes the Judgement! Often it happens that you know something without knowing nothing. And you keep pondering over, how did you knew that thing. Thats what called as Moribund Precognition (~DB) DB is more like a cave. First, you should have guts to enter inside! Now, remember free will is an illusion. What do critics do anyways? They basically alter by getting on your concussive unconsciousness. Same theory applies to advertisers. They try to sink in your basement. This is because they know that you are hopelessly confused idiot who can never make up your mind about anything and just buy upon neurotic impulses. Thats when you visit DB. What are you thinking so much about? Baby! I was just thinking should I buy Ribbed or Dotted? As if I care, get a rigged one! Lets start sailing.
CIV - Why we fall for Squinty-Eyed singing cowboys with beautiful plomino stallions? Dark side of damp basement is what has been referred to LSB - where ELDS will go awry. Irony is when we think about not thinking, we are actually thinking about it. And a monster that stays in the damp basement is Prejudice. Over the years, you fed it to grow it into an Awkward Monster. Just imagine, what if that monster moves to the dark side. How will one avoid the blunder? First thing first, do not analyse what you see. What you see is a lie. Remember, there is a stranger in the mirror? Frankly, I don’t know what I am writing but I am writing as my fingers turned just numb. My snap judgement is to write BLANK now.
CIII - Noticed? Please write a mail to Noah, if you did! Thats the prick’s comical trick. He is eagerly expecting a review of Blank. Do I sound cribbing? Too much ambivalent? Lets put some brains in it. Inside brain, there is left where linear thoughts are processed and right where creativity is derived from. And that noncognitives section lies under as sub-basement. When left is not right or right is not left anymore, then everything goes to basement. This basement is Unlocked. Inside there, there is Deli, Moribund, Dark Side and the Monster. If you don’t visit Deli at appropriate times, it will start stinking. The Monster will kill Moribund in awkward manner and dark will become darker. However, if you wish, moribund can become healthier with accept and build techniques. Frequnt visits to Deli will bring aroma of its own.
CV - Teacher -"Focus Group definition, anyone?" Respondent - "A group in which unfair is always checking how deep the cleavage is and Fair focusing on how high that bulge can go!" Teacher -"You Maniac, Guys just throw him out! Banish him to the darkest cellar! Chapter closed!"
CVI - "Wow! Thats such a beautiful house" exclaimed the Bigg Boss contestants. Exactly three weeks onwards, they realized the facade was left outside. So, you watch a lot TV right? By popular demand, 24x7, you can on-off something! Midnight Hot? Morphed or blurred? Give Up! There is nothing you can do now! Sleep time! Remember, thinking not allowed. Ever wondered how much Music is enough? Radio, Stereo System, TV, Walkman, IPods... Stop Singing! I am pondering how to write a review! Okay, don’t mind. I’ll learn to face music someday. And, why are you googling Poonam Pandey Multi-Media Services Ltd.? Enough with your nonsense, just keep your mouth shut! I am going to kiss you now. How does this Face Recognition password works? With Mouth Wide Open or Mouth Tight Shut? Enough! I cann’t take it anymore. Congratulations! Thats exactly what I wanted. you have been timed for tolerance. Sometimes cues are subltle, rest of the times they bray like an S.
Inconclusion - Have some blank moments in life, full of bursts of confusions and mental panic. Embrace disturbancesin life and cherish it without any whodunit and what went wrong. Leap into the void and act instinctively, even if somebody presses your balls. I have heard that Bungee jumping is the real sport! Know what you don’t suffer the guilty conscience because its a zone others wouldn’t dare to enter. By now, I am sure I have screwed your brains. Go first shoot the author and then the reviewer.
Just to sum up: Language usage is pretty abstruse, grose(Gross) and bellicose! Yeah! At times, I felt like punching the nose of Noah! Somehow I kept cool and managed to decipher few morals. A sound judgement, if kept open for judgement will definitely be affected.Practical decisions are least subjected to distractions. Habitual thinkers realize their folly after committing the same umpteen number of times. Taxing your brain wouldn’t qualify for returns.
As if someone will read it: YES I read it once. Then, I re-read as to figure out what I actually read. Second time, I saw something written between the lines. Your snap judgement would have outrightly told you that I didn’t like the book or the author. Let me tell you something more - I am OK, You are OK.
N.B. Please remember to rate and comment :)