Love affair Hits rock bottom before starting of. This is how it goes.
During a weekend house party characterized as ’’okay, ’’ radio stnt. employee Homer 24, mustered up just enough interest to hit on Tina, a sort of good-looking Radclife graduate student, Homer said Monday.
’’Tina was...cute, ’’ Homer said.
’’She could’ve been in better shape. Not saying I couldn’t either, of course. She definitely had a cute face. I’ve seen worse.’’
The party, held Saturday night at the apartment of homer’s longtime friend Frank Lizzer, was subdued, with fewer than 20 attendees. Homer said boredom and a shortage of eligible female guests inspired him to speak to the tall, curly-haired Tina.
According to Homer, of the seven women present, five came with dates. The only two unattached females were Tina and her friend, whom Homer identified as ’’Kate or Kim or something.’’
’’I guess the Kim girl had worked with Frank once, but she didn’t know anyone else at the party, so she talked Tina into coming with her, ’’ Homer said.
’’To be honest, I would’ve been just as likely to hit on Kim, but she kept going outside to smoke or plug the meter or something.’’
Added Homer: ’’Look, it was either talk to Tina or hang out on the sofa and eat Baked potatoes with Warren’s weird friend Andy .’’
Homer said his conversation with Tina was ’’civil, ’’ but also punctuated by awkward silences and nervous laughter.
’’Halfway through my conversation with Tina, my urge to hit on her ebbed a little, ’’ Homer said.
’’But I went on anyway. Force of habit, I guess.’’
During their conversation, Homer learned that Tina earned her undergraduate major in Latin American studies at the University of Delaware, can speak fluent Spanish and Portuguese, recently returned from a three-week Mayan art and culture study-seminar in the Yucatan Peninsula, and has nothing whatsoever in common with him.
’’I asked her why she was interested in Latin American stuff, ’’ Homer said.
’’I can’t exactly remember what she said—something about being part Latin. She seemed really smart. I would’ve been totally intimidated by her, if she’d been gorgeous.’’
About 20 minutes into the halting exchange, Homer embarked on a tentative flirt, and told Tina that the gray top she was wearing was ’’nice.’’
’’She thanked me and told me that my eyes were very intense, ’’ Homer said.
’’That was kind of cool. But I was also like, whoa, that was a pretty big leap she made—from clothes to body parts. It’s not like I pointed out a physical feature of hers. Hopefully, I haven’t released the floodgates here.’’
In spite of the pair’s lack of chemistry, Homer requested Tina’s phone number and suggested that they meet for coffee some time in the coming weeks.
’’I thought about inviting her to go to Club 505 after the party, but I figured that would be too forward, like I was trying to liquor her up, ’’ Homer said.
’’Besides, I was getting tired. Really, I just wanted to get home.’’ Homer said he gave Tina credit for inspiring him to remain at the party longer than he would have otherwise.
’’I still can’t decide whether I’ll call her, ’’ homer said.
’’Maybe I should give her a chance. She seemed all right. Not overtly weird. She was nice, I guess. I don’t know. We’ll see. It might be fun. Or not. Maybe.’’
Party host Frank said he saw Homer and Tina talking.
’’I noticed Homer hanging out with Kylie’s friend Tina at the party, ’’ Frank said.
’’It sorta looked like maybe they were getting along. That’d be cool if they hooked up. She wasn’t really my type—a little too plain. But she seemed cool enough, I guess.’’
As for Tina, she said she is ambivalent about receiving a phone call from Homer.
’’Homer was nice, but I wish I hadn’t given him my number, ’’ she said.
’’I just did it because...I don’t know. I honestly didn’t mean to send him mixed signals. I just made that remark about his eyes to get him to relax a little.’’
Seems like I cud do with some tips on this issue. Anybody who thinks I shud ’ve taken a different approach on the matter so as the to make the outcome better, as defined by most movies and stories, kindly lemme know some of the trade secrets.