Fear ~ it’s one word which brings in negative feelings. Fear means an anxious feeling. You may be fearful in any situation, eg just before an interview, result of the exam, when your ex. Calls after a long time, or when the boss calls in the office when he’s in anger that has risen to mount Everest, when
somebody else scolds, or even while getting married(well this last one was joke, a SERIOUS joke)
Fear may have unlimited reasons, needless to say, so are
it’s unlimited symptoms.
First of all let’s catch that RED light signal to
understand, when exactly we’re in fear.
*RED LIGHT symptoms
*1. Shaky or shivering legs, hands, body
Sweating neck, back, forehead, head etc.
Butterflies in stomach
Weakening body, falling in sleep at an unexpected time
Loosing the sense of cautiousness or responsive action sense
Freezing of palms, legs
Pounding heartbeats
The body hair stands erect
Changes in body, pale face, throat- desert dry etc.
Lastly extreme enervation, exhaustion
Well, these’re few symptoms to recognize the feeling of
fear. We may feel fearful of many things.*
Dreadfuls
*1. Insects and animals like snake, cockroach, lizard, dog, cat
etc
Ghosts n supernatural power
A particular person like ex., boss, husband, wife,
teacher
- A particular situation like exams, interviews, public
speaking, darkness etc.
Members of opposite sex
Crowded places – bus terminal, railway station
Rain, thunders, storm, even a weather~sunny burning summers without
water n electricity
Monday blues- when we’ve the entire hectic week ahead
Morning blues- it often results in sickness like morning cold,
unlimited sneezes
- Just after doing something wrong/ immoral/ things
prohibited etc*
>>>>> Why do we fear?*
Fear is common in all age groups. We feel fearful because of
*some experience** having a very
solid reason behind it. Sometimes you may know the reason of your fear and
sometimes you’re in a mess that “why the hell on earth do I fell fearful?”
let’s go to the **deep roots of fear**. I
*Case- 1***
Remember, your mom often used to threat you for locking
you in bathroom which is dark, full of cockroaches and lizards and even have
ghost in it , if you refuse to obey her
? **well this is the root that gave birth to many fears namely – darkness,
ghost, insects and even “mom “ in extreme situation. The poor child, if he
refuses, gets locked in the bathroom. Let’s not talk about the time duration of
his lock up, let’s see what happens during that time. At this crucial time he
cries, bangs the door, makes noise etc…. but at the same time it’s imbibed in
him that all these things are dreadful viz. darkness, ghost, insects and mom
off course! he carries these fears in his conscious mind till his teenage and after that it stays in
his subconscious till he’s alive
*Case-2*
*Fear of crowded place** I personally had this fear. Fear of crowed
places like a railways station or a bus terminal( not talking about normal bus
stops). I’ve worked out why I fear them and I’ll share it with you. Way back
when I must have been a child of 2-3 years, my parents used to instruct me not
to go anywhere, or else a strange looking man probably in black dress will take
me to his place, eat me or sell me to somebody. They used to make me hold their
hands tight, not to take out my hand out of train or else it’ll get chucked off
completely and then after I wont be able to write and forget if somebody will
marry me and I’ll be an unemployed spinster with a broken hand and a heart!
Well this was the height! the environment as known by all
is fearful(especially for kids) people
are busy, running in hurry, trains make unbearable noise. Those coolies –
dressed in red, carrying 25kg on their head, parents instructing their kids
(obviously for child’s good)…. al this is scary. The fears that I got from
this experience -crowded place, coolies, strange looking man eager to snatch
and sell the child, trains running at an unimaginable speed and chucking off
hand!*
Case -3***
Scared of opposite sex? **kids who did their schooling from a
boarding school or a non co-ed school might have problem in getting comfortable
with members of opposite sex. This lack of comfortable level catches fire, if
the first few experiences aren’t good. It goes same for boys and girls. **“For
HIM”-** I know a friend of mine who even finds problem having an eye contact
and talking with girls. Thanks to his boarding schools where he has developed
gynaephobia. After passing boarding
school he didn’t have a good experience with two of our female teachers. That
added a fuel to fire. This little fire caught flames when his girl friend left
him and insulted him publically. So we’ve a ready made man who can’t feel
comfortable with females**.”FOR HER”-** Before marriage a girl lives with her parents.
If the experience isn’t good with father/ brother/ some maternal or paternal
uncle(mama, chacha etc.); and after
marriage if the exp. Is bad with her husband, we’ve a girl who fears/
hates/distrusts men community as a whole i.e. androphobia.
These’re just 3 cases and we’ve numerous other cases as
well. **Crux is that, fear comes from some bad experience**. But in some cases we feel
afraid of something that we’ve never experienced before like while public
speaking, marriage(for bachelors), visiting a place for the first time. Well
this also comes from some sort of experience, i.e. bad experience from unknown
or unexpected. Surprises aren’t always pleasant.
*>>>>>>> Can we do away with them?*
Certainly yes! we can get rid off any fear on Earth! After
all fear is germinates and ends in mind. Suggestions that can help you are;-
*1.Acknowledge**- accept that you’ve a fear. I know at a
mature age it isn’t easy to accept that you’re afraid of something. This hurts
and punchers ego. But first be polite with yourself. Accept it gracefully. Talk
to a trusted friend. Taking counseling from an expert is also advisable. And then proceed on to ride to be a fearless
person.
*2. Work out the root cause –**once you know the reason
of your fear, it’s 70% battle won! go back to your past, think about the first
few experience.
*3. FACE it or SURRENDER in front of it – well this is the
crux, the climax of my review**. Once you accept yourself in that fear, and
know the reason why you’re afraid, you can hit the root cause of your fear. You
can hit your fear by telling yourself consciously and subconsciously that you
no more feel afraid of it. Read “Power of your Sub-conscious mind “ by Dr.
Joseph Murphy. Read and browse through the tips to do away with
fear. I assure you’re sure that you’ll
get ideas popping from every where very
soon. You’ll get the
ideas to do away once to chose to fight the fear.
*Running is no option**, your fear will come back in any
form sooner or later, if you chose to surrender or chose to run away from it. **FIGHT
FROM FEAR**! there’s a treasure in winning over your fears!
*Don’t surrender! Face it and then Fight back!*