Straight to the point , read on ....
Mahima Chaudhary (Official Aunty ji)
Debut - Pardesh ki Dhadkan .
The story - Subhash bhai was looking for a ’lime fresh’ face
, jisme ki kuch baat ho, One who resembled a flower, cauliflower to
be precise.Mahima approached him with her ’balanced’ and ’fresh
lime’ looks (One lemon in each hand).Saw mahima and was ’loot
gaye’ at first sight. She’s the one I was looking for
, everything’s is in perfect order , we just have to change her
name from Dadimaa to Mahima.
Acting capabilities - Wo kis chidiyan ka naam hai ? In her debut
movie she was ala’ olala Jumping jack where she plays the gaon ki
gori , Ganga . SRK falls in Ganga-jaal (Ganga’s trap , that
is).Swings her head wildly , madly , badly in ’khushi wale ’
scenes just like a happy-go-lucky Cow. She’s the perfect choice
for the role of a ’gaon ki gori ’ that’s the reason why she was so
desperate to land up a role in lagaan , unfortunately the role of
’amma’ was already given to someone else . So do not be surprised
when you hear her say - ’main maa banne wale hu’ because it means
that she is going to play mom to Anup Kumar in a yet to be titled
sci-fiction movie where Anup da will be playing Neo a la’ Keanu
Reaves. ( A movie strictly for the Expired-dated-adults).
After saying a big Mow to ’Item Songs’ she
decided that there was nothing wrong with ’Item Scenes’ thus you
can find her doing ’Important’ Blink-and-you-miss-me roles. Here
she plays the official Lady Devdas minus the wine.One dream song
and 20 ml tears later she is more than willing to sacrifice her
love .
Last Heard - She is busy ’Paes-ing’ her career. As the saying goes
- it ’paes’ to be an actress. In her words - We are just good old
friends, He is Good , i’m Old.
Twinkle Khanna (of little stars)
Debut - Bardast.
The story - ’Bete mera naam Roshan karna , Hritik nahi toh atleast
Rakesh Roshan’ was what Dimple said her and Twinkle was all pumped
up.Raj kumar santoshi decided that he’s had enough of Gadar Deol’s
rable-rousing and other wannabes should be given equal opportunity
.The movie was Tarzan-reloaded where the jungle boy leaves for the
city for high/higher/highest studies . The movie was billed as
different and Twinkle was the best performer from the other end
.
Acting capabilities - She is your typical damsel in distress with
expertise in fleeing away with the heroes (one hero per movie).On
horseback in Barsaat , in a truck in Melaa, On a bike in Zalim
....So she’s a naturally all-at-sea actress.
Since she wasn’t getting different roles she decided to do
’different’ things , like falling in love. Finally she confessed
to Sidhe-sadhe Akshay ’main tumse pyar karte hu’ . ’aacha!! tum
mujhse pyar karte ho !! main toh sabse pyar karta hu’.We friends
cried a lot the day she got married coz’ we knew she won’t be
doing any more movies (khushi ke aansu, you see).
Last Heard - Gave birth to a Calf ( Now what do we call a Cowboy’s
baby?).
Shilpa Shetty (Bhai)
Debut - Bazigar kaun?
The Story - The director Duo Abbas Mustan where looking for a
innocent face which could exude the innocence of a Goat thus she
came as a natural choice. Got a total of 22.5 scenes in the
movie.
Acting capabilities - If smiling is acting then she’s an excellent
actress. Well most of the time she is busy doing that. Close-up
smile. ’close aaoge toh up(upar) pahuch jaoge , after all she’s a
bhai, ’bhai bole toh underworld’. Clinging to her mangalshutra is her favourite scene .’koi
mere pati se poche’ .
If the rumour mill or rather saree-mill is
to be believed she threatened the owners of Praful sarees of dire
consequences should they fail to pay her ’supari(dues) at the
earliest .We are extremely ’Saree’ bhai humse galti ho gaye .
Last Heard -’ Bhai maine usko tapka diya , bhai maine isko tapka
diya . Bhai ab main kisko tapkaon ? ’
Kareena Kapoor (Pouting Thomas)
Debut - Refugee..ing
The story- She is Doubting Thomas younger sister.J.P.Dutta was
looking for a suitable girl to cast opposite Chota chetan aka
chota bachanna (remember him ? chota Bachaan jaan ke humse na
takrana rey ?).for his ’Magnum Oops’ .She was ’OK’ in her debut as also Tata , phir
milenge , bure nazar wale tera mu kala .
Acting capabilities - The ’turning pout’ came when she did K3G and
we still remember Poo because she wont let us forget. To her
acting means Poo..ah..pout .Her Histrionics suggest she is a
Historysheeter while her Ascent suggests that she got extradited
from the US the last night .When she signed MPKDH she insisted
that the title be changed to MPKDU?MF ( main prem ki dewane hu? my
foot).Adores one SRK (haan bhai, kyun nahi , ek pout-er doosre
pout-er ko pasand kare , isse jayada pout-bhari baat aur kya ho
sakte hai ?).
Last heard - I’m the best . Any ’Pouts’?
Priyanka Chopra (The dumb and the so-called beautiful).
Debut - The Heroine (The love story of a
dumbo)
The story - ’Farmer Missed-world’.Won Miss world by default .She was the most
intelligent & suave participant (from the other end yaar). Excerpts from an interview-
Question - So miss priyanka what’s the best thing about your country?
Answer - humare desh mein Ekta , Bhai Chara hai (Ekta kapoor, Bhai in Mumbai and Chara in Bihar).
Question - Who do you decide whether to sign for a movie or not?
Answer - I watch it’s box office performance .
Question - What about acting ?
Answer - Look (got a bit pholosophical) , acting koi kapde pehen ke karta hai? Acting comes from inside you know , ’wo dekho priyanka aa rahi hai apne Bedroom se’ ( inside, you see).
Acting capabilities - Though she’s only two films old but the signs are there to suggest that she is here to play a long inning in Short dress.Sang ’rabba ishq na howe’ where despite singing these lines the protagonists kept falling in love more than once.
Last heard - ’Thode-bahoot acting aate hai , agar aise hi kapde pehente rahi toh wo bhi bhool jaonge’.