Immediately after writing a review on stress I read a few on depressions. That set me thinking “Is there a difference between stress and depression?” At first I thought no, on thinking harder, the difference came forward…clearer and clearer as I kept thinking more and more. God! I should write a review on depression was my next emotion…then something inside me cautioned me…Hey no it said, if you keep writing reviews on these subjects, probably the next time you log on to MS, you may find members calling out “ Hey Shrink!” But then at the risk of being labeled a shrink(I have great respect for that profession and I must admit if I were a Doc, I would have been a psychologist, fortunately for many who need help, I am not one) So here is the result of my efforts on understanding depression….and possibly handling it….
Everyone can go through times of feeling down or grieving for a while after having suffered a loss. Depression is not grief or a feeling of sadness that all of us face mostly, for shorter periods. Clinical depression is something where a person feels extreme sadness or has no interest in activities and this can go on for a long time. Sometimes, this happens for no apparent reason to people whose lives are going well but usually it’s brought on by a major life event. Depression is not a sign of weakness or a character flaw. It is a medical condition.
Symptoms of clinical depression
• A never ending(seemingly) sad, anxious or’empty’ mood
• Altered sleep cycle(either more or less sleep).
• Altered diet(either over eating or under eating) weight gain/weight loss.
• Loss of interest or pleasure in activities once enjoyed
• Restlessness or irritability
• Persistent physical symptoms that don’t respond to treatment [such as headaches, chronic pain, or constipation and other digestive disorders]
• Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions
• Fatigue or loss of energy
• Feeling guilty, hopeless or worthless
• Thoughts of death or suicide
It’s important to mention here that women experience depression at roughly twice the rate of men. One in five women can expect to develop clinical depression during their lifetime. Regardless of age, race, or income clinical depression can occur in any woman, and can be serious enough to lead to suicide.(Sounds terrible, does it not.) But what’s worse is the fact that most women accept depression as a normal part of ageing, menopause, pregnancy and childbirth etc(according to various surveys conducted). Also such surveys indicate that many women don’t speak about it due to embarrassment or mere denial about being depressed. The reasons why women are more prone to depression can be summed up as:
• Biological differences(hormonal changes and genetics)
• Greater stresses from work and family responsibilities, the roles and expectations of women and even the increased rates of sexual abuse.
*How to handle it…
Well, lets face it depression at later stages has no alternative but consultation(and treatment) with a registered psychologist. But then tackling depression is as much a responsibility of the person affected and the immediate family/friends as it is of the Doctor. The clinical handling of depression can be and should be left to physicians. What I am going to suggest here just a few techniques I have found to be helpful when I feel down and out.
Positive Thinking: It’s all in the way we look at life. Just an example that has helped me a lot, uses the set of alphabets N-O-W-H-E-R-E. When I am really really worried and looking for peace I can either say “I can find PEACE NOWHERE” or I can say “I can find PEACE, NOW! HERE!” Try choosing the second way of looking at things you will feel much better.
Throw Perfection out: Where we are cruel to our self is in trying to make ourselves achieve perfection in everything we try to do….at work, at home, in a relationship.lets learn to accept that we are human and hence we make mistakes. Let’s make allowances for slip ups and probably then we wont be as affected by them.
Kill the guilt: We grow up listening to a lot of moralistic mythologies and so called “real” life stories of great men/women, who apparently had no vice at all. We try to ape them. Most of us, deep with in ourselves are our own greatest critics. We hate it when some one points out a huge mistake made by us, but often we spend hours cursing and criticizing ourselves for small errors committed by ourselves.
Jealousy and envy: Once again, I am jealous and envious, so what I am Human. Why should I not be? What I need to do of course is to keep it under check and try and use these emotions to my own benefit and the benefit of the society that I live in. Trying to root out these emotions can make you become some other person more precisely some other species.
For Gods sake, Talk! When you don’t feel comfortable with something, when you feel something is not fair, when you feel things could have been better, express those thoughts. Remember it’s much better to be known as a critical person than a critically ill person. Submerged emotions, unexpressed thoughts and repressed feelings are, the most commonly known fuel for depression. If you don’t have anyone to talk to(probably that’s why you are depressed) try talking to yourself(now don’t do this is a busy railway station or a supermarket…you may be branded a nut sooner than you should be)…. Talk to your mirror, your diary!
Believe: If possible in GOD…if not at least in destiny. A friend of mine once said “I don’t believe in God for I don’t want Him to share the fruits of my hard work!” But often it pays to believe in God for at least there would be someone to share your failures. Spirituality is something that can come to your aid when nothing else works. If you believe that all you can do is try(earnestly), but the results are often beyond your control, then probably you can accept life’s curious ways much better.
I am not going to write much about yoga, exercising, finding ways of expressing yourself like writing, painting etc, art of forgiving and many other similar techniques that can also help contain depression as they have been discussed by more competent members before me.
Before I close, I would like to also include something on how to react when someone close to you seemingly suffers from depression;
Acknowledge that the person is suffering Express affection, offer kind words and show that you respect the person Help the person keep active and busy Don’t criticize or blame the person for his/her behavior Don’t ignore any talk of suicide; notify a member of the person’s family or his or her doctor immediately. Encourage and make sure that they stay with the treatment until the doctor certifies them fully normal.
Dealing with depression is one of the most challenging situations any one can face, but then, there are millions of living examples of people, who have done just that and successfully too.
*Remember this is no substitute to MEDICAL ADVICE. Consult your doctor incase you have symptoms that indicate depression and don’t let that stop you from rating this review!