A woman is shamed for numerous reasons in India, body being one of those. VJ Bani, of MTV Roadies fame, who also starred in Yo Yo Honey Singh’s Zorawar, is one of the fittest celebrities on the block. However, she was also subjected to body shaming because she did what "women were not supposed to do". Because she has a muscular body, which is "so unlike women."
She took to Instagram to talk about body shaming, here’s what her post read:
’Lifting weights will make you look manly’I’You’re not a girly girl if you lift weights’I don’t lift weights because I just want to’tone up’Girls should only do cardio, lifting is for guys’So what steroids are you on’That’s way too much muscle. For a woman’_ All of the above and so much more. I’ve heard it all. And not once because I actually cared enough to ask, ’hey, what do you think of my body?’
I never entered the gym because of what people said I’should/ ought to/ must’ look like. I went in there to get strong, to be active, to be healthy, to sweat= to feel better, and more ME._ I can’t remember the last time the thought of’will this be attractive to so and so’ crossed my mind in relation to myself - let alone to me lifting
weight. It doesn’t happen. I love me so much and that’s all that matters,
I am so happy(blame all the endorphins) doing what I do day in and out that all else is tuned out. This is something I’ve gotten better at accepting and allowing day by day. That’s why you will always hear people say’it’s not just physical, it’s so much more MENTAL’ because to get to where you want to go, you have to look within and really be true to yourself and know that yes, this is what I’m about. This is what matters, this puts me in alignment and makes me a more joyful happy productive being. And guess what? You’ll end up inspiring and encouraging and being that source for other people along the path too. I don’t go around telling people they should eat healthier or lift or try to lose weight, you do you. I’ll do me. If someone asks for help I will always do what I can, I recognise the quest - but you need to recognise whether the desire really is there in you or not. Why else do you think we don’t see more people walking around with their Tupperware containers looking hench af? Because, if your hearts not in it, no matter how much you try - you’ll never get there. Cold hard honest truth. Just like cold hard iron, work and discipline. Just wanted to share that with y’all fam. Do you? #doyou #everyday #womenwholift #loa"
In her Hindustan Times post, she recounted how a well-known director asked her if she’d grown a pen!s yet:
"I have drool-worthy abs and a muscular body by choice, and that has put me at the receiving end of so much body shaming, it’s unbelievable. India puts too much emphasis on a certain kind of a body. For a woman, thin is supposed to be good, and if there’s any deviation — too thin, too fat, or muscular(manly, they call it!) – she hears no end about it….
For most people, body shaming begins when they are really young. I have a teenage friend, and I hear her father call her fat, fatso and similar names. He says them with love, but why? Your family is your support system, your first shield against the world, and if they begin to chip at your self-esteem and confidence like this, then who is there to support you?.
I still remember a well-known casting director who asked me if I had become a man yet; had I grown a pen!s yet? Seriously, she did! This was really long ago, and I have bumped into her often since, but even though I was seriously upset, I don’t show any anger. I didn’t then, and haven’t since. These people are not worth it…
Today I am in a happy space, personally and professionally. My career is really diverse as I am a model, a video jockey and an actress. I am getting movie roles that are based on my physicality, which is amazing. The film I did with Honey Singh, Zorawar(2016), where I played an assassin, sort of launched me in a special way in the industry. And now I am doing a Telugu film where, again, the makers sought me out because of the way I look…
I am a brand ambassador for a fitness app, and was the only non-athlete to be part of the Nike campaign that has 12 senior athletes, runners and others who represent the country. I think this is awesome, because it shows I am making something of myself by not letting detractors get me down.
I am happy that I am able to showcase the extent of body transformation women too can do. It’s all within us. Not in other people’s minds. So listen to your own self, always.
Let body shamers be damned."
Well said Bani J. Love yourself. Let not the society decide how you look. Don’t let the detractors hurt your morale.