Let’s talk about back hair. My friends cringe when I am swimming over at the nude beach for many reasons. Fine, I don’t have friends when I go there, but the women who are sunbathing give me dirty looks.
I thought it was in regards to the fact that I only have nine toes (see my review on Footcandy Nail Paints) but now I’ve recently learned its because my back is usually covered with a pelt of hair that rivals any Yack. Once I had a dream that aliens crafted crop circles in the deep grooves of my back hair, making wonderful shapes. But thats another story.
I hit up a local salon to get my toenails (what is left of them) ground down and while I was there, the manicurist Jyotish explained that Immac Hot Wax was one way of handling my untameable back hair. I said why not try it now?
Jyotish took me in the back room and after much prepping of my back with rough exfoliants to burst all of the ingrown hairs and infected nodules, Jyotish appleid the warm wax and tore it off with a burst of energy that reminded me of the time I tore off my mullet during a Hindu puja. Regardless.
Let’s just say that the several layers of skin that were ripped off during the process left behind raw patches that seemed like a thousand Indian Meal Moths decaying on my back.
After I recovered from the salon visit, my back pelt is gone and new skin has grown. Although at first an elderly nudist named Ahmet asked if my back was a crisscross of artifical skin I happily sunned my smooth back for all the world to see.
I recommend Immac Hot Wax for anyone wanting to rid themselves of coarse black hair like mine or any other hair. Rip it off! Stop being an eyesore! I didn’t get those itchy rash bumps that I got one time when I used Nair on my privates.
My back hair didn’t grow back for nearly 6 weeks. I would take a scarred back to a hairy Hobbit back any day wouldn’t you? Thanks Immac Hot Wax.