Scene 1: Producer Vashu Bhagnani calls up Director Talat Jani on his mobile.
Vashu: Talat, I want to produce a new film. Would you want to sit in the director’s hot seat?
Talat: Sure. I never refuse work. (aside) As it is I’m not getting any offers ever since I made Rang with Divya Bharti.
BTW, Vashuji, are you sure you will be able to deal with another flop, after the four great duds that you already have in your kitty?
Vashu: If that was a joke, it was a really pathetic one.
Talat: Wait till you see the movie.
Scene 2: Vashu and Talat are sitting in a story session.
Vashu: If Sanjay Leela Bhansali can remake Devdas, I will remake Anmol Ghadi
Talat: What he can destroy, I can destroy even better.
Vashu: Mehboob Khan here we come.
Talat: Mehboob Khan beware.
Vashu: Our film is going to be called Jeena Sirf Mere Liye. It is the childhood love story of a rich girl and a poor boy. Rich girl loves poor orphan but rich daddy plays spoil sport. They separate, grow up, find each other, fight rich daddy and finally get married. End of story.
Talat: (aside)End of the audience’s ordeal. Vashuji, who’ll play the hero and heroine.
Vashu: Karishma Kapoor will ...
Talat: But she’s getting married to Abhishek bachchan. Besides isn’t she into ’sensible’ films like Rishtey.
Vashu: Good point Talat. You’re a fabulous director. We’ll then take Kareina. Good old Poo.
Talat: Pooh! And the hero?
Vashu: Tusshaar Kapoor.
Talat: Vashuji, hero, I want to know who’s going to play the hero?
Vashu: Tusshaar Kapoor I said, Talat.
Talat: (aside) AARRGH! Great choice Vashuji, great choice.
And now the music.
Vashu: Nadeem Shravan. I will ask them to pilfer tunes from old ditties. Remember CID. I will ask them to steal one of it’s song.
Talat: You are amazing Vashuji. What movie-making sense you have. You have a great project on hand.
Scene 3: Vashu and Talat are giving TV interviews.
Vashu: What a film, what acting, what direction, what story, what everything.
Talat: I am proud of being associated with a project like Jeena Sirf Mere Liye.
Vashu: Talat, picture bano sirf mere liye.
Scene 4: The audience comes out of the cinema hall singing: ’’Talat Vashu hum tujhe peetenge apne liye.’’
Scene 5: Mehboob Khan is turning in his grave and praying.
’’Oh lord, forgive Vashu and Talat for they know not what they have done.’’