’’And so it happened, on the night of September 14, 2003, the semi-annual National Worstfare Awards were taking place. So far through the year we’ve had some great movies like 3 Deewarein, some great acting like Hrithik Roshan in Koi Mil Gaya, and some great directing like Prawaal Raman’s Darna Mana Hai considering it was a bizarre movie. Anyways, so on the semi-annual National Worstfare Awards, Main Prem ki Diwani Hoon(MPKDH) swept so many popular awards like Worst Actor(Hrithik Roshan), Worst Actress(Kareena Kapoor), Worst Direction(Surak Barjatya), Worst Playback Singer Female(Chitra and Sunidhi Chauhan- Sanjana I Love You), Worst Playback Singer Male(KK- Sanjana I Love You), and of course Worst Film- Main Prem Ki Diwani Hoon.’’
The following dialogues are from a transcript of the “Aap Ke Vichar” (Your thoughts) show which aired at about 12:30 A.M. in the brain of yours truly, Suprerna.
Host: Hello! Hello! And Welcome to another episode of Aap Ke Vichar, where we don’t have any celebrities, famous stars, just plain ordinary people like you discussing the general opinion of the public of the latest movie MPKDH. Today, we have a resident of Mumbai- a doctor, Suprerna Rai.
(Audience Applause)
Suprerna: Hi(shocked to be on T.V.)!
Host: Hello Suprerna! Why don’t you tell us a bit about your self?
Suprerna: Well, I’m a doctor, and I live in Mumbai. I love to watch movies, read good books, listen to music, and spend time with my family.
Host: We’re are glad to hear that. Well, you know what you’re here for don’t you. To listen to your opinion and about other’s opinion who are close to you about the latest love triangle, MPKDH.
Suprerna: Ya, I know.
Host: That’s great. Now lets start. O.K. So, what was your opinion about the movie?
Suprerna: Well, to be honest I hated the movie. It was just the regular old love triangle. I definitely can’t understand why directors will start making some sensible movies. PLEAASEEE! We can’t take more torture! The whole movie was full of flaws. Love story, sacrifice, best friend, how many times the same ting, Sorry, thing over and over and over and over.
Host: It seems that you really hated the movie. Can you tell us about the acting?
Suprerna: Acting! That’s a very powerful word. I wish the actors and actresses in the movie had heard that word. Kareena Kapoor wasn’t doing anything right. She just fluttered her eyes and made weird expressions. Hrithik Roshan in 1 word-HORRIBLE! With a capital H-O-R-R-I-B-L-E. Nothing compared to what he did, not even close to Koi Mil Gaya. Abhishek Bachan was standable. He didn’t have much to do, but did it pretty O.K. However, nearing the climax he became a bit bad. The supporting cast like Himani Shivpuri and Kareena’s sister were lousy. Himani Shivpuri repeating the same scene from Hum Saath Saath Hain. Pankaj Kapur- Plain O.K. Reema Lagu- Sweet and simple. Jhonny Lever- His usual useless roles in Suraj Barjatya’s movies- ALSP(As loud as possible).
Host: What else? Could you mention some specific scenes?
Suprerna: Sure! The part where Ruby Bhatia appeared in front of nowhere trying to put on some weird accent. I don’t know what sin I committed to bare that much tortue. Infact, I don’t know what scene I committed to see the entite 1st half! The emotional scenes where Kareena and Hrithik come to know about the whole truth was utter rubbish. Maybe Abhishekh bought a little grace to the show, but he still looked bored. But I guess looking at the whole, he and Reema Lagu were the only bearable parts.
Host: Hmm… Haha! So, what did you think about the direction?
Suprerna: Get me a vomit bag! Oh God! This is definitely the worst Barjatya movie I’ve ever seen! He didn’t handle any one single scene properly. It seemed that while he was directing, he either decided to have a picnic and no work, or he realized what a lousy movie he’s making, and just decided to get over with it. Also, the place he called Sundernagar-there is no place in India that looks like that. Also the animated PIECES got on my nerves. And to think he tried to be modern. Na-ah. Ho, he just made a fool of himself.
Host: Oh! How did you like the story?
Suprerna: Like I said before, there’s no story in it. It’s just horrible. Nothing new. Nothing sensible. Nothing good.
Host: What did your friends and family think?
Suprerna: Well, almost everybody I know hated it. Some people who are even huge fans of Suraj Barjatya hated it. But some people actually saw it twice. It all depends. Now days, the audience are asking for better movies.
Host: Thanks Suprerna, a lot for coming.
Suprerna: It was my pleasure. Thanks a lot!(goes back stage)
(Audience applause)
Host: Well, thanks a lot folks. Hope to see you next week, same day, same time!
(Credits)
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