Whenever I see the repeat telecast of KOFEE WITH KARAN, I cannot understand, that how could Karan Johar, of all people, produce a movie like Kaal. I mean, a person like him, who is obsessed with family-dramas, rona-dhona , ostentatious homes, (and of course, the letter K) , suddenly , shifts base to a remote jungle and includes ghosts in the cast? Makes no sense to me but did make sense to Karan’s wallet, for the movie did well at the box-office. It worked only for Karan and not to forget, Shahrukh(because of his hot item number). But bad actors, the costume-designer, the over-dosed make-up man, and the incapable director, all, received flak as Karan backed out saying that he did not hang around the sets, even for a day!
Well, I happened to watch KAAL recently, that one rainy day when I had nothing else to do as I was very sick.I think the typhoid bacteria in my body were damaging the nerves connected to my brain while I was deciding to watch this flick. Also, the movie reviews at the time of the film-release, were not too bad. I was absolutely gung-ho about Karan Johar films and this made me sit in front of my T.V. screen, for, I had not seen this film before.
After watching this horrendous, “HORROR”- flick, I wished to write to Karan, in my own style, telling him , what I thought , of Kaal. Of course , i do not wish to upset him.
Thus, through MouthShut, my message for Karan is as follows.
Karan, Karan
Oh my dear Karan,
I know when u saw Kaal,
Your head hung with Sharam.
After making movies like
Kal ho Na Ho,
U must have seen this one,
And cried “Oh no!!”
I realize that Soham was
Sent by Ram Gopal Varma.
He’s your enemy no. 1,
And tried to sabotage ur “DHARMA.”
While Shahrukh’s hot item
Was the only saving grace.
What happened in the rest of the film,
We were unable to trace.
John was a guy who
National Geographic did hire,
But only seemed to maintain his tresses,
Under circumstances dire.
I understand Your film
Was truly Low-budget.
That’s why u chose Esha and Lara,
And made them camp in their skimpiest.
As the girls bodies
Were too much exposed,
The make-up for the woods,
Was quite over-dosed.
And Ajay can boast
Of being an actor profound,
But here he was, captured in a jungle
Going round and round.
While Vivek only said,
“JUST CUT THE CRAP”,
The tigers you boasted of,
Were a good audience trap.
And watching this film
Made the viewers sleepy and weary,
Kaal turned out to be
Everything but Scary.
We know how much u trusted Soham
And handed the money from your vault.
Karan, Oh Karan,
Kaal just wasn’t YOUR fault.
You know U are the best,
When it comes to sarees and Gehna,
Hey, we r all looking forward
To Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna.