When I heard of Ontoes, the name conjured up visions of super cocktails and sizzling music. So, jumping into my party-wear and into the party mode I trooped over to JVPD Scheme where the pub is located.
‘Dress Code’ said a stern board at the entrance. ’’Sheesh, I aint wearing my tie’’, I thought. But why the hell should I wear one I was supposed to go to a party place? As it turned out, the board didn’t mean a thing and I got in without a hitch. That’s when the trouble began. Walk in and you go blind. The lighting’s almost non-existent, almost as if the owners are afraid that they will be bombed by the ISI. So I gripped the nearest thing I figured would be appropriate and settled myself down doing a 365 degree survey around.
Besides smog, that one gets to see at Delhi and Calcutta airports, there was from a distance, a waited appeared from nowhere, (just like the smirnoff ad). As my eyes tuned into the dark vision, my senses started rapping to the music and my throat quenched for the bloddy mary I had ordered. As I peered thru the hazy smoke, I noticed the decor was hardly impressive, nor innovative, the seat that I got had a TV fixed a foot over my head, like the sword of Damocles. It made me look like the whole of Ontoes was staring at me.
My drink came, in a jiffy(quick service)as I swayed to the music, and as the 1st shot of the Bloodiest of Maryies pierced my pharynx, I got up to intelligise the water to play some rock instead of the blues brothers. A 2 minute talk with a pen down of the names I wanted left me satisfied that I didn’t have to pay for the music.
A delicious chicken spring roll(approx 75 bucks as far as I can remember) downed with another Bloody Mary saw my rhythmic body sway to nothing what I could call rock music. I gave up, before the DJ turned me into another PJ. 2 cans of tomato juice making them the Bloodiest of Mary’s and a chicken spring roll doing the lambada in my tummy, I decided to tip-toe on my toes out of Ontoes. Pledging to myself that the next time I make it here, I would have a chick, instead of a TV ’on’ me.
All in all and jokes apart, On toes is a 5 on 10 scaled place, with good munchers, punches and thank-god no bouncers. An ideal place for private parties, caters to the mid-management crowd rather than the rich son’s rich kids from the nearby Mithibai College. All in all a good dekho….Hic!!!