This is supposed to be a brooding, dark and classy romantic tale of unrequited love between two physically, emotionally and racially mismatched individuals- the emaciated concentration-camp-incarcerated-Jew-look-alike: Dhanush; and the robust, broad shouldered and towering Sonam. Both are difficult, if not entirely impossible to like.
Well, the story is unconventional, and quite entertaining till the first half, after which it peters off into a political commentary with doses of social activism and street plays and the rise of (I suspect), an Arwind Kejriwal’s AAP inspired party. The first part is mostly shot in Banaras, which seems to be in a state of perpetual Holi celebrations.
I am told this movie marks the Bollywood launch pad of the YouTube one-song-wonder; the much Kolaveridid Dhanush. If you are launching this impoverished, lanky and unshaven son-in-law of a Tamil superstar into my schemata of Sunday entertainment, well, I tell you, I will have nothing to do with it. I can bear an odd aberration of my idea of good looks, but I will not have you perpetrate him as a matter of habit! Let him be humored once and then dispatched back to YouTube or My tube, ASAP. This guy is better off singing; I mean imagine having Asha Bhosle as your next heroine!
My wife asked who had designed his clothes in the movie; for they were dreadful. I told her it’s not the designer’s fault; because nothing looks good on this guy.
Abhay Deol lends his old world charm to the movie but is sent off rather abruptly taking the magic away with him. I believe Shahid Kapur was the original hero for the movie but he quit for unknown reasons; thank god for the small mercies. The musical score of AR RAhman is average (as usual these days, ) and I believe the Director initially rejected it outright, which I hold him in high esteem for. The other girl in Dhanush’s life, the very lovely Swar Bhaskar was a delight to watch. She out-Helens the much lipo-sucked and waning Sonam any day.
At the end of the day I asked the manager to refund half my ticket price because the second part was a documentary and not a movie for which I had actually paid.
The Plot
Dhanush is the son of a Tamil import; a Panditji who looks after a Mandir. Dhanush has a childhood crush on Zoya, the celestial beauty, born to a Muslim teacher. Zoya responds to his wooing with 16 slaps and one spitting.
Swara Bhaskar loves Dhanush who barely notices her and often beats her. Zoya notices Dhanush only when he slits his wrist in Cl X, after which incident her parents dispatch her for education to Aligarh and JNU, where she falls in love with the college leader, Abhay.
When she returns to Banaras to a waiting Dhanush, she fails to recognize him (who wouldn’t?) and then saddens him by confessing her love for another man; whereupon he promptly proceeds to slash his other wrist, which by now has become a habit with our manly hero. Now she must manipulate an unwilling Dhanush into somehow helping her to marry her sweetheart with a lie, which when nailed by Dhanush publicly, leads to bizarre and tragic consequences. Thereafter Zoya can only feel loathing for a befuddled Dhanush who won’t ever take no for an answer. He continues to serve her chai, while she plots her revenge for her dead lover.
Their one-sided love story never really climaxes or gets resolved satisfactorily, leaving you confused and revolted in the end. You feel sorry for no one except yourself and your loyal flock who have obediently trailed behind you on a Sunday in anxious anticipation of wholesome popcorn nourishment and dance and song business.
The movie is good for viewing in the first half and for snacks, and answering email and nature’s call in the second.