The scene: A cold, winter night, snow outside, buttered popcorn and hot coffee inside.
The cast: BH - better half aka beloved hubby aka brawny hunk, TF - the friend and ME.
The mood: Action/Horror . after a lot of deliberation, we decide on watching the Resident Evil flicks, the sole sane voice of womanity being overruled by the testosterone twins. I want to watch the Last Legion but am finally moved by the nauseous looks on both faces . they’re only delaying the inevitable anyway.
The background: BH has played the game, TF is only concerned with Milla Jovovich, while I’m sulking, plotting my revenge .
Resident Evil()
In an incident that smacks of AI-Gone-Wild, the Red Queen, a computer operating’The Hive’ the top-secret research facility of the Umbrella Corporation seals off this lab, and kills all the people inside. Alice(Milla Jovovich), head of security at the lab, her husband Spence(James Purefoy), both of whom are suffering from temporary amnesia after the mass murder, a reporter(Eric Mabius) and a special ops unit(Michelle Rodriguez, Colin Salmon and the other folk, all categorised under zombie fodder) must journey into the Hive to find the motive & switch off the rogue computer. As they journey deeper into the complex and Alice and Spence start getting their memories back, the team discover that the shutdown was because a new research virus called the T-virus, has escaped into the lab atmosphere. Of course, the T-virus turns the dead into zombies. The flesh-eating, blood and gore feasting kinds. Now, the team must escape the complex after quarantining it, all the while being picked off by zombies(human and dog kinds), with or without the help of the Red Queen.
ME(surprised): Well, that wasnt bad!
BH: It was amazing, the Boss was real scary as were the effects! Classic zombie movie setup, I thought. Nice game setup too, I liked the suspense, how the viewers slowly discover things with Alice. Wish there was more flesh chomping going on though.
ME(Boss? Never mind) I liked Rodriguez’ tough act(grumble)wish they hadnt killed her off on Lost
TF: Yeah, the zombies were a little tame, I liked that genetically mutated Licker monster thing the best. Isnt Milla Jovovich hot!
Resident Evil Extinction(.5)*
The Umbrella Corp tries to contain the spread of the virus in the Hive but it has spread to Raccoon City, which the Hive was built under. Umbrella manages to evac all their top scientists and quarantine the city. In the ensuing confusion, Angie, the daughter of the head scientist Dr. Ashford(Jared Harris) has been left behind and he refuses to leave the area without her. Alice wakes up in the hospital where she learns that Umbrella have been conducting experiments on her. Umbrella seal off Rapid City, leaving all the citizens to fend for themselves and the undead to feast. Alice hooks up with Jill Valentine(Sienna Guillory) a tough cop, an Umbrella special ops captain Carlos Oliviera(Oded Fehr) & the rest of his team, a petty criminal LJ(Mike Epps) and a journalist Terri Morales. Operating with Dr. Ashford, as their eyes and ears, their mission is to locate Angie, in exchange for which he will help them to get out of Raccoon City before Umbrella nukes it. Alice finds that to help her new friends, she must battle her nemesis, an old friend from part 1, and an increasing awareness that Umbrella experiments have changed her to something less than human.
ME(beaming like the Cheshire Cat): Oooooh, I just remembered who Spence is!
BH & TF(baffled): Spence?
ME: Milla’s husband! He was Mark Antony in Rome! Do you two idiots even know the name of Milla’s character, or any of the other characters?
BH (patient, and willing to catch me up): We just finished part 2, sweetie
TF: Yeah, it was decent but where were the zombies? Atleast the first one had a lot of plot surprises to it, this one was mostly action. The action stunts were really good, but .
ME: I heard u screaming Goooooo Milla!
TF(takes a deep breath): That was some scene! Milla, biker chick in biker chic, crashing through a church window, back-flipping off the bike, firing her gun in mid-air, exploding the gas tank, frying that Licker . and the other hot babe running around in the background .
BH(as all snigger): Let’s finish up .
Resident Evil Apocalypse()*
It’s a couple of years since the last movie, nuke-ing Raccoon City doesnt contain the T-virus which has now spread all over the world. The survivors from part 2 are all separated. The only way for any survivors to stay alive is by being constantly on the move. We find Alice trying to stay’off the grid’, since Umbrella can now track her by satellite. We are also introduced to another convoy of survivors led by Claire Redfield(Ali Larter) which contains some of Alice’s old friends, LJ and Carlos . Of course, the Umbrella Hives all around the world are still operational. In one of the North American Hives, operated by the White Queen, we have the Mad Hatter errr. scientist, Dr. Isaacs(Iain Glen), conducting experiments with Alice’s blood and the zombies, ostensibly to domesticate them, in reality creating a type of super-zombie. As expected all these different forces come together in deserted Vegas to create a lot of zombie madness and mayhem. The mission - fuel their vehicles for an escape out of Wonderland, in this case to a small isolated pocket of land in Alaska which is rumoured to not contain any infection. And Alice finally discovers why she is so special to the Umbrella Corp.
ME & TF(disgusted): What a dumb movie!
BH(a bit defensive): I liked it! The special effects were good, I liked the idea of controlling Alice by satellite, the fight scenes with the knives and(slightly sniggering) the scenes with Salt Lake City and Vegas.
ME: Agreed, but there’s no story and no character development to speak of. As for Milla, she and that Mummy guy have completely forgotten how to act! I was really disgusted when they started crying together! The SLC scene was just to show off the zombie dogs and ass-kicking MJ, but someone needs to tell the directors, while creepy the first time around, those dogs are boring. Atleast they didnt start on white rabbits .
TF: You know, if it wasnt for MJ no one would even watch these movies .
And he’s right! MJ has definitely made the role her own and is very good with the action. She also has her Leeloo face on just fine, but the one time when the movie gives her the scope to move out of the two emotions she’s comfortable with(bad-ass and lost) you just fall around laughing. The special effects have gotten more ambitious, so you do get a stylish production but with less suspense and the corny jokes which seem to be a staple for action scripts. I did like how all the movies had very strong women, Rodriguez, Jill Valentine, the convoy leader, Alice, but their costumes irritated me. Jill’s cop costume, a corset and mini-skirt, had me rolling my eyes till I was looking out the back of my head. But, do I have the energy or inclination to get all riled up about this. Not for this genre anyway . The end sets up for a sequel, but I wonder - what can come after the apocalypse! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!