Uhhhhh.... Hi
This is what I said when I was once late for a really important speech made by our professor in 12th standard.
I would like to mention that phrase again, ’’Uhhhh.... HI?’’
Sorry for being away from this site for a long time. I had gone somewhere to mourn about the departing of a dear departed relative.
Well anyways I’m back so don’t ask any questions otherwise I’ll make a false report about your health and ruin your love life (or do any damage to you whatsoever). Yes this would be the simple solution Kektaa would give any of her serial characters to ruin someone’s life. Now it’s a funny thing I’m writing on this topic because I, an I would think most of the let’s put it as Me-TYPE people or even Anti-Karan, barjatya Chopra clan don’t ever see Ektaa Kapoor serials(if you missed the sentence see above) which is very difficult
cause thats what goes on half the time on TV. And if it’s not you it’s deffinitely one of your family members.
So anyways getting back to the review-
Just 2 days back I was chatting with my friend and she’s a complete telly soap addict.
A small transcript:
Friend: hi :d when did u cum back?
Me: hey not dat long time back
Friend: btw im cuming 2 ur house on sat
Me: thrilled
Friend: u wont beleieve wats happened in kkusum suppy!!!!
Me: u say suppy 1ce more and u wont beleive wat happened 2 u
Friend: :p arre 1st listen na! mahi dies and the blame goes on kkusum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me: missed it on zee news den
Friend: arre dont u know who mahi is! she was supp 2 be surrogate mother 2 abhay and kkusum but then kkusum had a misundersatnding dat mahi and abhay were in luv and dats y she seperated from him. and now kali is putting the blame on kkusum!
Now for those who did’t understand a word of the ending of this conversation, and I wish I didn’t, I’ll tarnslate this horrific story to you from Kkusum- Ek Aam Ladki KI (last thing on earth I would call her) ki kahani, one of Kektaa’s leading soaps.
There is this heroine: Kkusum and she has 1 of the most unaam kahani’s I’ve ever seen. She goes thorugh life marrying a few times, divorcing a few times and ends up with 1 daughter(Kumud) on who’s tangled marriage web is revolving on now. Ofcourse her 1st and last husband, Abhay Kapur has also 1 daughter Kali who seems to have the lakshya of getting Kumud’s husband Garv. On the other hand, Garv alsmost always seems to be in a trauma as to whether his wife loves him or her ex-lover who still loves her but didn’t marry her thanks to a corrupt doc who told him he had cancer. Didn’t understand 1 bit? You’re not the only 1.
As for the future of this episode, Kkusum will be 60 yrs old and will always be shown in the background crying, Oh Ya! 1 thing I forgot to mention- this serial should have a crying competition between the lead stars. They have some serious competition with K3G’s lead characters! So where was I....oh Ya, the future. Ya so Kkusum will be shown with a shwal draped around her cluchting her walking stick to go to the bus stand to shoot the title song. The stroy will revolve Kkusum’s grandchildren and how they have no clue who their fathers are and plan to kill each other until they finally get the Kapur property which has expande like nobody’s buisness.
And at the end of the ttl song- it will read- Kkusum- Ek Aam Ladki ki Kahani(with Kkusum surrounded by her grandchildren.
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Now if you look at Kkusum’s plot and compare it to some Kahanis and Kautiis and not to forget Kyunkis of Star Plus, you might even think Kkusum as
a story with a decent plot. Yes I know it’s unbelievable but we’re talking about Kektaa here.
Now, a very interesting point of her serials are that all the villians/vamps are never, I MEAN NEVER causght/accused/misunderstood(i mean understood)- they always Always ALWAYS manage to accuse someone else OR get away with it. I think there is some weirdo in a Kausauti Xindagi Kaay in Star PLus with the name- Komolika and even the famous Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahun Thi’s Ansh. So if you’ve comitted and murder or even bought black tickets- Kektaa’s badbrains will have the solution. They’ll tell you exactly how to hoodwink your bhaya and blame your bhabhi.
aNOTHER VERY BEAUTIFUl aspect of Kektaa’s serials is the health issue- Ba is a medical miracle SHe has great-great grandchilren and she never dies! WHEN I said that outloud once, somebody told me how I mean can
I get. Ofcourse, once everyou join Kektaa’s serials, forget about ever having to deal with wrinkles, looks of fatigueness, or other old age symptons. Your skin will always look like that Loreal model’s.
In every person’s dictionary in Kektaa’s serials, you’ll always hav the word extra-marital affair. Me and some of my friends only call these soaps- lafdebazis’’. WHole day someone has to be having an affair, rarely anyone escapes this part. And particularly with someone in the same family! How ridiculous can life get? Even Astitva is full of affairs(sadly Ajay Sinha doesn’t get any other topic) but the way relationships are handles in that serial will make Kektaa’s seem like a joke or maybe even funnier than colge/school crushes.
Perhaps the most amazing thing about her serials is the coming back of 10 00000000000 characters. If they are dead, they ether come as a ghost, plastic surgery, re-birth((which she seemed to have stolen the idea from Aruna Irani)
and almost everything posibble or impossible, but don’t worry, they’ll come back.
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SO thats what Kektaa’s to me. As bad as Karan Johar(worse?). I would really like to question her someday on her serials in front of the public. Why does a perfect Indian woman have to be a house wife decked up in jwelerry all the time-
which reminds me that the reason I liked Stepford Wives more than it really deserved is because of Kektaa’s shows. Another question, why does each family she shows have a huge buisness which have problems only when it has to do with
a plot planning to destroy the family? And just 1 more, why does she make the most haywire, absurd, spechlessly degrading the woman of today, and totally horrifying serials? Anyone who actually sees her soaps must be
horrified to ever go near an Indian woman.
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OK SO I know this is sort of a come-back review and isn’t so good, but please be easy on me.