Surfing aimlessly as I often do on MS, I found this topic that set me thinking. Though I am currently a resident of Mangalore(not Bangalore typed wrong), which is relatively smaller Indian city, with its obvious pluses and minuses, I have lived most of my life in Chennai(formerly Madras), which is one of India’s biggest cities and was until recently only Metropolitan City in the south. I have also been to Delhi(one of those original metros that has not been renamed in the recent past), Mumbai(formerly Bombay), Kolkatta(formerly Calcutta), Bangalore and Hyderabad. I have spent less than a week in Kolkatta and Hyderabad, but much more time in most other cities to have a rough idea about life in a Metropolitan city in India.
- The cynic in me looked at the topic and chuckled; is there “life” in metropolitan cities, for there to be a “Social life”…was my obvious reaction.
“Delhi Chalo” was the slogan proposed by one of my favorite Indian freedom fighter. As India gained independence and started its journey towards a “better tomorrow” the slogan got altered, it became “Metro Chalo”. The closest Metro was supposed to be your answer to making some quick bucks and a luxurious lifestyle. Ram Singhs and Arunachalams by thousands left their traditional homes and their traditional vocations in search of their dreams in the so called Metros, Mumbai the city of Dreams leading the way. The result was over population in these cities.
Now this resulted in congestion… of all sorts; cramped accommodations, traffic jams, pollution, invasion of privacy, poor sanitary conditions….and what not. * Metros of India today are reflection of extremes….Highly affluent class flaunting their prosperity, the poorest of poor flaunting their poverty and ever increasing middle class that’s the silent majority. Not seen, often not heard but witness to everything that’s happening around. Amidst all this is there life.?* I am forced to think yes but it is far too mechanical.
Aye dil hai mushkhil jeena yahan….
Wake up to the alarm clock not the chirping of the birds(though science has now ensured that there are alarm clocks with some almost natural ring tones). Sometimes it’s the honking of the vehicles, street corner quarrels near the corporation water tap(very common in water starved city of Chennai) or the mosquitoes that have survived the “all out” attack that wakes you up. If the smog lets you and if you have the time then maybe you can catch a glimpse of the rising sun(in the city in which I grew up however rising sun was more visible, coz it was the election symbol of a influential political party). If your neighbor hasn’t flicked your newspaper and if your milkman has given you more milk than water(not a worry in Chennai as milk is cheaper than water), then you can enjoy a good cup of coffee with the early morning headlines. No time for detailed news reading… you will miss getting to office in time. Mornings are time for multi-tasking(something that the Indian urban beings mastered even before Bill Gates introduced it to Windows)…. You may never be able to do one thing at a time. If you are a family man/woman well God(rumor is that He/She too has left the metros long time back) save you. Its said that well begun is half done… but then what happens to days that begin this way.? The confusion and tension continues to build and reaches a crescendo by evening, normally a time reserved for SOCIAL LIFE!
Life in metros:
Friendship is difficult to find in a city that is always on the move, sometimes even more difficult than finding a breath of fresh air. Most people you meet are just familiar faces or sometimes acquaintances or colleagues; rarely friends. If you have grown up in a metro, you probably have a few friends from school or college, if they haven’t migrated to the US or Australia or the Gulf or any other greener pasture(suddenly realized what a misnomer that is… or is it… the green here refers to dollars is it.?). If you have come to a metro after you finished your school or college chances are that you lead an entire lifetime, hoping that people whom you consider friends are really your friends. No one can be blamed for this fiasco. * Life in a metro is competitive, it is war and like some famous theory on evolution said it is about survival of the fittest *.
But all that was said in the past need not be true. Look at this for an example “behind every successful man there is a woman.” I really don’t know if that is a truth as on today but what I know is true is that in most metros “behind every successful man there is at least a dozen of colleagues who are trying to pull him down, a lot of neighbors who envy him and are wondering how the hell is he successful when I m not.” Also there are a host of “yes-men” who will stick on to him as long as he is successful and move to the next one the moment he ceases to be one *. If this successful one is a woman, then the troubles are even greater, there are people who wonder as to what is the reason for her rise to success, beauty or brains.? (I have often come across members at MS attributing popularity of the ladies on MS to the pictures on their profile… what a shame, both in the case of it being true or untrue). *
Now what am I arriving at, well very simple. I believe that the social life that exists in today’s metros is phonier than the WWF matches. It’s a huge drama. Broad smiles, tight handshakes, warm hugs, unending compliments on the lines of “hmmm… you smell good” “Cool shade .huh”, sweet nothings… this is what social gatherings are full off. You don’t really need to look deeper to find how shallow most of these exchanges are. Backbiting, gossiping and rumor-mongering is actually what most high profile parties are about. Moralities have taken a beating. * Jessica Lal and Natasha Singh are bitter examples of high flying social life in metros and their effects . I have nothing against partying before anyone starts wondering if that’s what I am driving to. I am of the school of thought that it’s a group of friends that make a party, when it becomes the opposite, as is the case today things get out of control. I mean if you start thinking that attending a few parties will get you friends you are mistaken, especially in the physically and fiscally motivated metros of today. *
I should also hasten to add that there are of course a few fortunate mortals who have a good friends circle and hence a great social life, even in metros. * Pubs, clubs, discotheques, banquet halls or restaurants in five star hotels are abundant in Metros. But Alas! These don’t make good social life by themselves. To have a nice social life you need humans. You need people who relate to you, who think at your wavelength, people who appreciate you for who you are, not what you wear or where you work, people who laugh with you(not laugh at you behind your back), people who trust you and whom you can trust…. For a good social life you need FRIENDS(Metro or otherwise)!