Note: This write up is a first copy of the plot for a future Bollywood blockbuster. Any similarities to any Hollywood or Bollywood movies is purely "Inspirational". As we say here in Kopywood. I mean Bollywood, Art is 99% inspiration and 1% percent respiration.
Malati Jaiswal(Preity Zinta) is a famous upcoming Pop-singer singing in a competition arranged by Radio City, Radio Mirchi or any of the half dozen similarly named FM radio-stations. With huge banners for cellular phones and cars as the background(product placements). Gayatri Singh(Rani Mukherjee) is a journalist with a Tehelka-style newage online publication - SabKoldhe.com - who is covering the competition. She bumps into MJs beau Pavithra Prabhakar (Hrithik Roshan) while purchasing popcorn for her younger sister at a concession stand. Just when the duo, literally bump into each other and sparks nearly fly, MJ starts crooning - " Dil. Awara Pagal hai Dil. blah blah blah .Sunn balliye, nachch balliye. soneya mere maahiyaa." and so on.
Flash back: PP remembers the ring given to him by Rosie(Baa from Kkkk serials) chachi. PP being an orphaned Hindu boy left outside a church was found by a priest and raised by D’Souza(AK Hangal) uncle and Rosie chachi. Hearing PP has got hots for MJ Rosie chachi gives PP the ring to propose to her.
But wait. Naye Sarkar(Abhishekh Bachchan) the so-called Naya Gabroo(NG) has an axe to grind with PP, who happens to be Makki Manav in secret identity. Gabroo believes Makki was responsible for the death of his father Hare Gabroo( Amitabh Bachchan) also known as Hare Sarkar. He battles PP on a’flying broom’ . After a nailbiting fight NG sees the photo of his wife Aishwarya Rai lip-locking with PP [ courtesy dropped scenes from Dhoom 2], dropping down from PPs pocket. NG yells at PP ’ Makki. thune mere baapu ko maara. Mere biwi tak ko na choda’ and falls off the broom unconscious. Now PP feels double guilty for having been responsible for BGs death and, also, lip-locking with NGs wife.
In the meanwhile a big and balding Haryanvi Jaat, Faulad Singh, (Sunny Deol), has escaped from Tihar jail. FS was actually responsible for D’Souza uncles death as explained to PP by DIG Khan(Kader Khan) -’Yahi hain woh shaitaan jisne D’souza uncle ki jaan lee thi’. As luck would have it Faulad Singh after meeting with his cancer-affected daughter and shedding gallons of glycerine is on the run from Pandu hawaldars and their emasciated doggies.
After easing few of the carnal(karnal) canine of their misery with his dai-kilo kaa haath FS lands in the site where’Dr. Laloo Prasad Inistitute of Advanced Studies in Animal Husbandary’ is conducting experiments to convert cow-dung(Gobar) into bio-diesel; using a mixture of cosmic radiations emitted by tubelights fitted on all sides of the well. As the tubelights start revolving with an overhead fan, gobar starts flying all around and FS vanishes into a pile of cowdung. Pandu Hawaldar exclaims -’Yeh to Gobar bangaya!’.
However, since FS has been wearing a Taavis of Ajmeri baba gifted by his daughter, he survives the radioactive gobar and becomes Gobar Danav. He comes out of the pit, after the hawaldars have left, screaming -’Ek Ek ko chun chun ke maroonga’. As if’Gobar Danav’ spreading his havoc on Mahanagari wasn’t enough - looting banks by making staff unconcious by his stench; MMs expsenive suit built from remnants of Cat Woman Halle Berry’s Walmart costume - which she tore to shred after the movie tanked - turns White! (inspiration aided by BW innovation), without it being washed in Nirma; or for that matter any other washing powder since Krrrush 2. The reason - white milk powder dropped on MM by a passing meteroite.
While PP/MM is busy fighting Nirma-Safedi(whiteness) and romantic encounters with Gayatri Singh, another photographer from’Dainik Shanknaad’, Elangovan Balasubramaniam(Vijaykant making his Hindi debut) has been stealing photographs from PPs studios to save his Amma in trichy who’s suffering from kidney failure. PP catches EB red-handed, costing EB his job. Blinded by the bright white light of his suit, PP doesn’t to see EB crying and begging for mercy. EB swears revenge on PP.
Troubled by the rising power of his glasses due to continued bright light, PP/MM decides to shred his suit over a Muruga temple. Coincidently, ES is breaking kogonuts in the temple praying Muruga the power to kill Makki Maanav. The pieces of PP/MMs suit transforms into rainbow-Govinda-shirt and blue [venomous] lungi around ES. And the stage is set for the final showdown between Makki Maanav, Naya Gabroo, Gobar Danav and Zeherila Lungi.
Watch rest of the movie when it’s distributed by YashRaj films soon.
PS : Himesh Reshammiya makes a special appearance in the end, defeating Zeherila keeda(venom symbiote) with his supersonic nasal intonation of’Oooooooooooo Huuuuuuuuuujoooooooorrrrr’ which drives mad - not only the alien, but also everyone else in the theater.