It is my deep regret to request the honour of your presence to attend the delayed, belated and postponed marriage function of my precious son,
MANOJ SHARMA (MANU),
Doctor, Heart Specialist from London (Decent, Good Looking, open hearted even not for operation, not seen a lady’s face other than the bride till date, love old values and old songs)
with
TANUJA TRIVEDI (TANU),
Old Student, Delhi University who changes boy friends every week and finds no difference between horses and men possess all bad habits, including smoking, drinking & drugs.
This unavoidable disaster will take place in our relatives Manson in bollywood marriage hall in Punjab (Where the marriage of our relative Jassi & Payal took place like most of the marriages in bollywood) from 25th February, 2011, 9.30 am.
Due to financial and written material shotages, the function will take only less than 2 hours from your precious life which any way you are willing to throw away in meaningless movies. The cost controller of the marriage function was of the opinion that the program should cut short to 1 hour, editing out all scenes after the marriage ceremony including the food. Then, the hall manager made a valid point when he stated that if the function is less than one hour 30 minute, they will not permit us to collect the Ticket for entrance. You all know that we are not a rich family and this marriage function is our only hope of making some money we have prepared some bad food after the marriage function. (No need of keeping change with you, as we assume you don’t expect any balance. Important notice: Ticket money is non refundable.) So, you all can avail the colourful food after the interval. Difficult to digest mutton, half cooked chicken, smelly fish etc. are part of the dishes. Smoking, chatting and drug addiction is permitted after the interval but it is strictly prohibited before interval. We have invited the local police office as well so that nobody question the bride or groom about their decisions and actions. So, ask such questions at your own risk.
Many of you may find this marriage ceremony conducted by Anand L Raj very similar to the recently held ’Yamala Pagla Deewana’ and some to the (g)old films DDLJ, HDDCS PARDES & JWM. Then, what to do? We parents have very few choices. We cycle and recycle the scarce material. We are small family and do not expect such a grand function but something of that genre.
We are awaiting a Guinness book of world record representative in the opening ceremony for the most distinguished/disastrous bride watching event (yes, you read it right. It is not bird watching) where the naughty Tanu took 5 doses of sleeping pills to skip this disastrous groom meeting. It is heard that the Guinness book people are discussing whether they can consider the same incident for the craziest love story beginning as well. Knowing that you will all enjoy the event we caution you all not to make any commotion after watching the crazy entertaining bride watching episode.
My son, Manu(Madhavan) is a darling of everybody and in our presence he is our sweet cute child. Don’t expect any adventures from him like when he was one of the three Idiots. He is simply best in the controlled/silenced version. My would be daughter in law, Tanu (Kangna) is so adorable in her new avatar till the marriage function (you will simply love her and if you feel like eloping with her, do so after giving your contact to her parents) and if you find her entirely different character after the marriage function, say interval we cannot blame her for that is the fate of all brides. You can also enjoy the company of bride’s friend Swara Bhaskar who will give memorable moments during this function. Deepak Dobriyal’s Pappi (don’t misunderstand for Kiss, but it is his code name) is a treat to watch. (How I wish he met the Poli of YPD) You may hear some big shouting by Jimmy Sheirgill but don’t be scared. If anybody hear Ravi Kishan complain he didn’t get an entry to the compound don’t mind it, it is a punishment for him.
Whether you like the food or not, we have prepared an excellent variety of music which you all will enjoy thoroughly. Even if you feel some of the songs are too good to be in the movie, never mind, enjoy them! Knowing that we have a quality song department, we tried our maximum to over supply it. You will get a colourful treat of Saroj Khan’s choreography and for a variety one song is choreographed by Ponny Verma as well.
Videography of the function will be by Chirantan Das who is known for creating average satisfaction but we have supplied him cost affective films. We tried our best not to use sets so that the art designs will have minimal spending. So, if you feel some backgrounds are not attractive, instead of complaining take your make up set and make up your faces to the flashes.
Since the bride has a tendency to elope we predict an eloping soon after the marriage. Probably you can witness the function before you leave the hall as well. Saying that, don’t get shocked if I have to send you another invitation for marriage of my son soon, where I have seen the girl rehearsing a rhyme with a singer soon after the dinner.
Spoiled father of a scared son
With Love, Mad Kith & Kin