Resume -’They won’t believe what you say so you will have to lie in written.’ They might as well ask you to fill up a questionnaire, you need to know a bit about it too.Here it goes .
Name : Nakul Chhadha alias Notorious Chhadha alias Bunty ’daru-pine-wala’.
Educational Qualification : Qualified enough to arrange the degrees you guys are looking for.
Renumeration Expected : Yes.
Work Experience : Over 30 years of experience in different fields . Reading Garfield, listening to Whigfield , cricket field ( Current status - Fielding for ’mere naye padosan yaroon’.
Age : Whose ? my naye padosan’s age ? * The question is misleading , kindly elaborate a bit.
Nationality : Indian. Typical ’bhartiya nare’.
Father’s name : abey kiske dad ? bachee ke jaan lega ? thik se poch questions.
Conveyance : ’iske kya jaroraat thi’ anyways if you insist , i’ll go for a Honda City.
Eye Sight : Hmm... I can clearly see the going-ons in my neighbours home situated 300 m from my home when I stand on a chair (you do the calculation now).
Height : 7 feet 6 (with chair) & 5 feet 9 (without chair).
Marital Status : yeah, nice question . Two of my gfs are married . Myself - single and looking for more.
Why do you want to join this organisation : No comments.
Can you work in night-shifts : night -shifts !!! pehle batana tha . muft mein karonga , muft mein !!
Your weakness : ’sharaab’ ’sabab’ aur ’kabab’.
Your strength : Hardworking (remember, night-shifts?)
Down to earth (gira hua aadmi).
E-mail : you_have_got_male_gals@yahoo.com
Password - 123abc
(** you guys at MS are not supposed to try this password with my id , I ain’t that fool to tell you that actually my password is abc123).
Where do you see yourself 5 years from now : I see myself in the arms of your wife/daughter , though I must confess , 5 years is too long a period.
What do you look for in a Boss : A human Being .
Hobbies : First tell me , is there any girl who will be reading this C.V?
What do you look for in a job : Let me make one thing absolutely clear to you buddy , you are boring me now . I’m just lookin for a ’job’- ’job pyar kise se hota hai’ you know.
Describe yourself in one sentence : .....to be continued.
Preferred nature of job : natural jobs. Night-shifts .
Are you an optimist : Depends . Actually i’m a pesioptimist (here ’p’ is silent).
Are you a team-leader : Earlier I thought so but lately i’hv come to know that I was not being followed but chased.
Postal adress : Why am I being asked questions of personal nature?.
That’s it friends. Feel free to get my Paid service.
Your favourite quote : ’Best way to start a business - you have two cows, sell three of them’.