A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. - Robert Frost

Two lions broke loose in the zoo and were eating a clown. One lion said to the other ... "Does this taste funny to you?" - Unknown

Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat. - Jim Davis

I'm a classic example of all humorists — only funny when I'm working. - Peter Sellers

Great Britain and the United States are nations separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. - Will Rogers

(1879 - 1935)

A comedian does funny things. A good comedian does things funny. - Buster

Keaton My formula for success is rise early, work late, and strike oil - Paul Getty

I just thought of something funny...your mother. - Cheech Marin

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious. - Peter Ustinov

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny. - Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts

One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool --Edgar Watson Howe

Jazz is not dead, it just smells funny. - Lyric from Frank Zappa's "Be-Bop Tango"