I fell in love with my dumb wife on SECOND sight! The first time I saw her, I didn't know she was rich! I told her I love her not just because her father left her a huge fortune. (Just between you and me, I would have loved her no matter who left her the money! Heh! Heh!).

Well, one fine day, she realized just how rich she was. I got a call at home just as I was sharing a favorite “man-joke” with my drunk buddies, “The quickest way to lose 180 pounds of ugly fat is to divorce her!”

Barely audible over the deafening guffaw, she yells excitedly, "I just realized just how rich I am! Whoo-ee--start packing!"

I couldn’t believe it: Dumbella finally woke up! "That's great," I say. "What should I pack?"

And she says, "Whatever you want, A**hole! Just be out of the house by the time I get home."