ANDAAZ is an early 90’s love triangle with a twist.
Akshay Kumar plays Raj, a college student (A 37 year-old playing a 19 year-old...maybe Amitabh would have been ideal for this role) who met his best friend, Kajal (Played by Lara Dutta) when they were kids. Ohhh choooooo chweeet! When they were young, he had to wear a brace because he had a car accident and we see a scene copied from Forrest Gump, where some boys take something and she says ’’Run, Raj, Run’’ and the braces break off of him. Very well-contrived LOL
So he grows up and loves Kajal, but he can not propose to her because she wants to marry an air force pilot who will fly her all over the world, so he joins the Air Force (Where it the tongue sticking out face when you need it???). When he comes back, she grabs him and tells him this long story, all in one run-on sentencem about how she met some guy who can fly a helicopter, Karan (Aman Varma), and plans to marry him. Raj is heartbroken but gives his approval and the wedding takes place (At least thats what I picked up while hitting FF on the remote) and Kajal finds out his secret and tells him not to ruin his life in some very high masala-content dialogue.
Intermission!
Raj has to fly off to Europe to get some training and his family cries because they are so upset about his loss of love...and boo hoo this...and boo hoo that...and some emotional blackmail, meri shaadi hogi jab main laut kar aoonge......
At some nightclub in whatever forlorn city he is stuck at, it’s New Year’s Eve and in comes Jiya (Priyanka Chopra) who is drunk and her boyfriend Monty is drunk and they act stupid and Raj drives Jiya back to his place to recover. Of course, she falls in love with him and he thinks that she is a nutcase, but she continues to call him and stalk him and confront him in the street where she goes {’’Hey Man! Are you blind? Can’t You see That I’m Beautiful!!!’’ He lies to her and sneaks back to India.
Surprise, surprise...Jiya somehow magically found his family in the land of one billion and is there as a paying guest. She acts slutty and spoiled as any Western girl does in Bollywoodland, and does not know anything about sanskar. Raj yells at her for being such a bad woman when some guys attempt to rape her and he beats them up and you know the rest...finally, he asks her to marry him.
But dum...dum...dum
Surprise twist...they go to visit Jiya’s parents and we find out that Karan was Jiya’s sister and that Kajal is her bhabhi and that Karan died in a plane crash...oh my god!
Well, that is where I will leave out. I imagine you will see or figure out the rest of the flick. You almost feel like taking your head and banging it against a wall when you see some of these scenes. There is really no comedy in the movie and it isn’t really romantic either. The plot is straight out of 1987 or 1993. Lara’s voice is dubbed, because if you’ve ever heard her speak Hindi, you know why. Pretty but not very talented, Lara does posses an enviable tall slim body with nice curves. Priyanka is a babe, but she is untalented as well...she tries to act sultry and ends up obnoxious. Akshay Kumar...I guess he is halfway decent. No one else to comment on.
Music is blah, blah, blah...