’’This very week in 1989, there were protests in East Berlin and in Leipzig. By the end of that year, every communist dictatorship in Central America had collapsed.’’
—George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Nov. 6, 2003
As I promised in my last review, the old gujju couple were not done yet. Mid flight, just when the plane started galloping up and down due to turbulent weather, old man decided it was time to take a leak. He took a leap though. The movement of plane was enough to send the man running 3 feet away and trip over a nonplussed lady who taught aisle space meant additional leg room. After lifting him up and getting him back to the seat, I discovered to my horror that I had finished Stupid White Men rather too quickly, with another 10 hours of flying left.
When the operator announced “We will be shortly arriving in Paris” my old man quipped “Mumbai avee gayoo atle jaldi?” (“Mumbai came so soon?”). After some more pleasantries and explanation that we were still continent apart, I buried myself again into the second book I had got for in flight concentration. This was “Dude, where’s my Country” by none other than Michael Moore (The more I read Moore, I love him!).
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Dude Where’s my Country?
In this second book on bush-whacking, he completely and solemnly concentrates on the dubious man, Bush. This time Moore centers his research around Bush and his bunch of cronies and how they led a nation into believing that they first scared a nation to go to war, and then tried convincing people that they were actually liberating a nation’s people. [Come to think of, the weapons of mass destruction still haven’t shown up; I wish my grand children hear of them sometime]
There are some truly hilarious chapters in this book. In 7 Questions for George of Arabia, Moore exposes how the bush family has had a tradition of oil well deals with well you guessed it the kith and kin of Bin Laden. Moore asks the very question sensible ask and (most Americans have simply forgotten) – Where is the much acclaimed Bin Laden? A nation which thrives on latest gadgets and space technology fails miserably to catch the one man responsible for 9/11.
Moore also presents exciting recipes where the main ingredients happen to be
1. A bowl of Rice
A dick-full of Chaneys.
A foul smelling duck called Donald
Some dried and dangerous weeds from Texas passing of as Bush.
Each of whopper meals come with ample salad dressings which can be changed and modify to suit audience tastes at different times. They include
1. I-Nuke: Iraq has Nuclear Weapons dressing
I-Bio: Iraq has Biological Weapons dressing
I-Lib: We are Liberating Iraq dressing
Al-Qaeda and Saddam are tied dressing
Oil wells must be protected dressing
Note – the above ones are my creation – Moore knows how to mix them in the right proportion and serve it to you in form. For more please read chapter 2 of this fantastic book.
Moore also addresses this nation obsessed with ‘Terrorist Threats’ and ‘God Bless America’ Syndrome. In a hilarious letter from God, Moore explains how even God must be tired of Bush acting his messenger every time he croons on TV – “God Bless America!” Moore is as fascinated by various colors and codes for threat levels as much as I am too. He suggests practical ideas as to what do with them. He tries to bring vanity into Americans into believing that their chances of getting killed in a terrorist attack are far far lower than they meeting an accident on road!
Moore also takes a dig at the Patriotic ACT 29 which was accepted in wake of paranoia in the country there by finishing any kind of privacy anyone may enjoy in the country. In the name of security, Yokun Ho! You may not speak up!
By the way the much acclaimed tax cut by the Bush actually cuts taxes only for the billionaires and not the common man. The trillion dollar tax cut meant millions of cuts for the super rich while for the common working man turned into a mere 30$ a year. So much for the cuts – Moore exposes the false ideologies behind many of Bush’s moves and that what makes it even more interesting!
[Oops a digression! In the middle of the flight, our captain announced that we were flying over Arabian ocean and should be in Mumbai in another 3 hours. The Old man who probably heard the Mumbai part of it asked me “Are we on runway?”; I shook in disbelief and asked him to take peek outside the window seat he was occupying and confirm it for himself”]
Coming back to the Bushy Adventure, Moore probably gives the best thoughts on terrorism in the middle of the book, which goes by “HOW TO STOP TERRORISM: Stop Being Terrorists!”.
And yes, he also leaves the common Americans some spring time cleaning work to do; He sets a plan for the cleaning work and how to go about removing Bushes and other types of dangerous plantations and thereby save his homeland.
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I won’t digress into his writing style again – he is not a literary achiever; he simply talks to you and you simply listen and have a good laugh. That his research is pretty extensive shows from the notes and research work he mentions in the book itself. Without creating any controversy, let me state that I tend to agree with Moore’s opinion, though I will not rule out the possibilities of propaganda campaign by Moore himself. However I and Bushwhacking get along very well hehe!
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In the end, is this book a worth successor to the Stupid White Men? It is! If you are planning to read that one, may I suggest you read both of these books in one go? They are supremely hilarious! I also refrain still from making any comments on his political inclination as I am still not in a position to do that.
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However as much as I tried to stir myself away from the oldies, I couldn’t ignore them. They were nice people at heart; When I was alighting at Mumbai airport, the old man and his wife thanked me for helping him out when he fell and also being patient with numerous visits to the bathrooms, the medicines, the luggage movement, the theplas, the form fillings. It was the “Thank You” that really touched me and probably why I will never forget them too.
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’’[A]s you know, these are open forums, you’re able to come and listen to what I have to say.’’
—George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Oct. 28, 2003