They call it ’’The Land of Freedom’’, because unlike most other countries in South Asia, Thai people have never lost their freedom to any European power ever. I planned to stay there for a month to find out what is so special about this race.
Don Muang Airport, Bangkok, is huge! Checking out was fast. Though I am overweight and going bald, the lady at the immigration felt so sorry that I will stay only for a month. She said in a meow voice- ’’You have a 60 days Visa, we would be so happy if you stay for 60 days sir!’’ Wow! Thats why Europeans say ’’Thai hospitality is beyond compare.’’ Thrilling!
I spent the first few days at Pattaya and Kanchanaburi. Pattaya is 150 Km from Bangkok by bus. It is like a vast urban brothel flooding with fat old European/ANZ customers, who are tired of their fat old wives at home. You will see lots of dads and daughters, drunk, french kissing, coming out of Go Go bars, but don’t look! Let them feel free and have fun.
There are also decent groups of European families with guitars, enjoying their own music in the small bars, creating a nice ambience. There are great Water Sports on the sea, and being inside the bay, its safe from disasters like Tsunami. If you like weird entertainment, dont forget the ’’Tiffany’s show’’ - The most beautiful MEN in the world!
Kanchanaburi is on the West of Thailand. 5 hours by bus from Bangkok, its perfect for a quiet vacation. You can spend the night on a group of boats floating on the River Kwai. Its called ’’Jungle Raft’’. Without electricity or mobile signal, its beautiful, charming and hair raising. A life time experience.
After that I went back to Bangkok. A city with a weird blend of cultures from the East and West. Expressways, miles of flyovers, multi star highrise hotels, neat condos. decent taxis, sky trains, underground metros, large AC buses, you can choose whatever suits you most. Everything is air conditioned, so a bit expensive. But the cheapest option is condos for lodging, and normal buses for transport, and they are not bad either.
People in Thailand are easygoing and very jolly while talking. They never honk while stuck in traffic jams, there is no quarrelling for a seat in a bus, no fighting if your car hits another car. Good manners and politeness is very important to get along with this race. The language is tonal, so it sounds more like music than just a conversation. There is a lot of ’’Sorry’’ and ’’Thank You’’ everywhere. People will even apologize with folded hands if they step on your toes in a crowded bus.
Since the general culture in India, Pakistan or Sri lanka is opposite to Thailand, its difficult to get respect if you are an Indian. They call us ’’Khag’’! It means something like ’’unwelcome guests’’. So Thai people do not like ’’Khags’’ because ’’Khags’’ are ’’rude, ugly, without manners, and they ogle at scantily dressed girls’’.
I had a Thai friend who said ’’Indians come here to look at girls, because in their own country its difficult to find girls before marriage due to the sarcastic nature of their culture.’’ My God! Instead of fighting him, I myself became very careful after listening this.
Thai people are quite smart, but in a different way. They earn money by being polite, showing hospitality, smiling, helping, and in the end charging you for all that! Nobody will cheat you as far as service is concerned. Nobody will sell you plastic in the name of Ivory. They will sell you plastic in the name of plastic, but charge you the price of Ivory by using their smile. Guess why no European force was ever able to conquer Thailand? Its because they are sweet, ego-less, & they know how to fool even the smartest of races with a baby smile.
Drugs and women (!) are abundant in Thailand. Sex is not a big taboo, so people start losing their virginity from mid teens. Both boys and girls can join the sex trade, and its difficult to tell who is what. Lots of cosmetic surgeries and high maintenance result in perfect looking damsels with voices like Katherine or Tina Turner. The pay is good. So they can afford it.
One weird thing about Thai people is that they have a talent to make up award winning sad stories to get your money and attention. If you dont pay up, maybe the same person will call immigration and send officers to check whether you went out with your passport or not. If not, you may end up paying a huge bribe to save yourself. Of course the storymaker will get some percentage from that. So I would suggest you not to indulge too much, and not to copy what the European tourists are doing. Stay simple, stay Indian, remember your mom and sister.
Do always carry your passport. And also, never ask road directions to a Thai. Not even a policeman or bus conductor. Carry a map and find your own way, otherwise you may end up reaching Cambodia.