16. Have a Pleasing Personality:That is kind of the general theme of these ten tools for your success, and one of the most important tools in your pleasing personality kit is a good and firm handshake. Be sure to look the other person in the eyes when you are shaking hands. Train yourself to look for something pleasing, it helps to maintain your smile and when you do, they will feel comfortable and trusting towards you.

17. Listen, Listen, And Listen:Did I mention Listening? There is a reason the lord gave us two ears and just one mouth; always listen twice as much and twice as hard as the person you are talking with. Be sure to realize you are talking WITH and not to them! It is amazing at just what you will come away with and at just what people are willing to share if you are willing to listen. This is a skill I cannot preach enough. This is one of the real biggies people!

18. Visible Responses:Smile - this one is paramount to your success. Nod in agreement, use your eyes and body to convey feelings and thoughts; and always be sure to remember and “use” names. Lose the “he” and “she” when speaking with others and get names into your writings and conversations.

19. Pay Attention:Actually even better said is “pay attention to the other person, much more than you are paying attention to yourself.” Your stories and your history can wait; theirs are more important right now. You will get your turn, don’t you worry. Be sure to respond to EXACTLY what they are talking about, lose the “filter” and go with the topic and conversation at hand; even when it might be one you are not completely found of…

20. In Summation:You always need to “Sum it Up!” Be sure to “restate” often; get it right, and get it clear. Do not assume anything and always be sure to clarify. Let all that are involved know that you are processing their information and that it is important to you to be correct in understanding it. Let everyone feel at ease with you, let them feel comfortable in conversation and always allow them time to make corrections. Your final summation is in your hands, being thorough and following through to the final detail.

And now it is my turn to “Sum it Up!”

— Don’t get carried away. Don’t go overboard. Be self-confident, but do not be arrogant (been there, done that - the T-Shirt is not something you want to own).Be sure everyone knows you seek their expertise and that you value their opinions.

Remember - Your communications skills are key!