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By: nehasachy | Posted: May 18, 2010 | General | 624 Views (Updated May 18, 2010)

Disclaimer: I love superheroes and superhero movies, the inappropriate costume, the bulging biceps, the simpering girlfriend standing around to be saved every 5 minutes…it’s a heady concoction, how can I be unaffected?


After much thought and research (watching movies spread around like a beached whale on the couch, all that popcorn, midnight oil to be burned…no one can say I shirked my responsibilities as a serious researcher) these are MY 007 answers to the ultimate new age question:


HOW TO BE A POP CULTURE MOVIE SUPERHERO


1.Get the costume right. This is serious business, how can you go about the weighty task of saving mankind every fortnight if you can’t get your clothes right? The requirement are simple, stretchy pants, colourful underwear and preferable a mask..like superman and his front hair lock as opposed to specs and combed back hair of Clark Kent. Get the aerodynamics right. By the way which dress does it count for Dr. Bruce Banner, the researchers white coat or the shredded pants?


2.Have a properly disguised alter ego. Just to get things in perspective, where would the world be without the nerdish glasses and generic business suits of Superman.. Alas a world without steel or atleast a MAN of steel. Without the nerdish glasses of spidey (to be fair he does use a spider mask).


3. Establish your USP, have a superpower: spidy with his webs and tall building jumping technique, X men with their Hugh Jackman, Superman with his steel. By this account, is Batman out? Technically he has no superpower, just lots of tricks and gimmicks AND the batmobile. Does Robin count as his super power? And Iron Man…having an internal reactor powered power suit count as super power?


4. Get your villains sorted out: At the outset, there are no superheroes without super villains so let your arch rivals have as exotic evil ways as their names…The riddler, bane, poison ivy, Mr. Freeze, Lex Luther, atomic skull, composite superman (yes he is The Mans' anti MAN), Bizarro, Eradicator, the American army, humans etc


5. Be a billionare: Many times over if possible. A super hero cannot save the world and hold down three jobs to pay the rent, see what happened to spidey? He lost his girlfriend to sundry friends and army jocks EACH TIME?


6. Follow the highest order of sensitivity: Search you soul at each possible moment, preferably just before Doctor Octopus, Green Goblin and Venom strike. That way you can make a grand entry and save the world just in time. Remember, you cannot be a super hero if you are not secretly obsessed with your dark personality, dual identity, feel lonely and cannot cry buckets over the havoc your secret identity is wrecking on your love life.


7. And pass in this testhttps://thesuperheroquiz.com/ to find out which superhero you can begin by copying. Warning: donot use similar logos like giant S or bat shaped flying missiles least your do gooding might be attributed to other colleagues.


Tags :
How, to, be, a, superhero
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